I’ve got a fun episode for you today, coaches. You’re hearing about this late, but a few days before Christmas I bought myself a brand new sports car and I learned a few things, so I thought I’d share them with you here in the hopes that they inspire you to think about your money in a way that makes you feel amazing.
If you’re a long-time listener and follower, you’ll know that my fiancé and I both have Audi cars, and I’d been thinking about getting a third car for the winter for a while. I know this may sound completely unnecessary to you and like a waste of money, but I urge you to listen on to hear the discoveries I made along the buying process that I think will resonate with you.
Join me this week as I share the backstory behind why I bought my new sports car and the deep things I learned by working through the mind drama that came up for me. No matter if this story inspires you to go use your money to its fullest potential, or whether it feels totally irresponsible, I hope it has you questioning how you, too, can live your life in a way you love.
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What You’ll Learn from this Episode:
- The backstory behind why I bought this car.
- What I mean by “strategic impulsiveness”.
- The growth I saw in my own self-concept through the experience of buying my car.
- What I know about the kind of money you can make as a life coach.
- How I got past my mind drama and the discoveries I made from doing that.
- Why I felt shame when I was contemplating buying the car.
Listen to the Full Episode:
Featured on the Show:
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- Ep #85: Thoughts About Rich People
Full Episode Transcript:
Welcome to the Make Money as a Life Coach® podcast, where sales expert and master coach Stacey Boehman teaches you how to make your first 2K, 20K, and 200K using her proven formula.
Hey coaches. Welcome to episode 114. Today is the day that I’m going to tell you about the six lessons I learned from buying my new sports car. Are y’all ready? I wrote six of them down, but I have to just tell you the whole story. We’ll weave these six things in.
It’s the craziest story. So I’m actually recording this right after I got it. It’s January. We got it a couple days before Christmas. You are hearing this in March because we already have our episodes planned out between now and then, but I really wanted to talk about it on the podcast because it brought so much up for me.
So I’m going to first tell you the story of how this even came about. Actually, so the first lesson I learned is the idea of – the concept of strategic impulsiveness. I’m going to tell you about what that is. So let me tell you about this story and then I’m going to tell you the six things because I know it’ll resonate with so many of you. I had so many things come up.
So many of you have been sending me IG messages when I posted in my story, @staceyboehman if you’re not following us. I posted the photos of the car in my story and so many of you were commenting that – especially so many women were commenting that it was so inspiring.
So I really wanted to talk to you about the lessons. So here we are. Let’s just start with how this all came about and then we’ll dive into the lessons. So the backstory is for the last, I would say year, so was it two years ago maybe? We went to Audi, my fiancé and I, and we each got a car.
So he chose the Audi Q7, which is like a SUV. And I got an S5 convertible. So it’s the sports version of their car in a convertible. It is very sporty, it is very gorgeous, all white, black interior, and that thing is fast. And if y’all don’t know this about me, I have no shame in saying I love to drive fast. It’s my favorite thing ever.
My grandpa apparently used to drive fast and didn’t know what a brake was. I inherited that from him. I always tell Neil like, first of all, I don’t drive with the intent to not get a ticket. It’s not my main priority. I don’t even think about it. And I always tell Neil that if I were to get pulled over, like I almost always get a ticket because I’m not sorry at all.
So I can’t do the crying girl thing and get out of the ticket. Actually, funny backstory, I got pulled over once in – I actually think I hadn’t bought this car, so I think I was driving my Camry. I don’t remember. But I got pulled over and this is a true story. The cop asked me where I was going in such a hurry, I was on my way to Indianapolis, and I told him I’m running late to meet my dad. I bought him an Indy race car experience and the cop died laughing and I did not – it’s the one and only time I didn’t get a ticket.
He must have thought what a cool daughter, and also, it’s pretty funny that – I think I was going 30 miles over the speed limit and like, on the way to a race car experience. So I grew up, my dad loved fast cars, my dad was always talking about engines and it just was a thing.
We love to drive fast, my dad when I was little had a supercharger in his Bonneville. Pontiac Bonneville. Do you guys know what kind of car that is? Anyway, he had a supercharger in it, and I might have drag raced it a couple times down the interstates in college. I love to drive fast.
Okay, anyway, I drive safely fast now. I care a little bit more about the contents inside the car now. So anyway, I love fast cars, it’s the backstory. So I got my S5, I love it, I drive it around everywhere, it’s my favorite thing to just hit an empty interstate and just fly, like I love it. And I love to have my top down. I push the top-down limit to the most ridiculous amounts.
Like it can be 60 degrees outside, and my car has neck warmers in, I’ll have those going, and the heat full blast, and I’m just like, windows up, trying to make the top-down work because I love fresh air so much. So I love this car, but for the last year, I have been thinking it would be nice in the winter to have a car that wasn’t a convertible.
If I could just, you know, be really extra, having – I call it a winter car. Having a winter car would be kind of nice because it’s not the same experience driving my convertible with the top up when it’s cold. I don’t really like to drive it when it rains because it just hugs the ground so low. It’s a great car but I just don’t feel as comfortable.
And I’ve been thinking I want a luxury car. I want that – a sedan that’s really comfortable. We can’t really take people in the backseat of my car. We can, it’s not great. We would never do that for date night out. So I’m like, you know, a car to be able to have people in the backseat sort of situation.
And we’ve talked about it on and off, but we have a three-car garage and it’s very tight and Neil would basically have to do all the parking almost always because I would not be able to do that. It would be a tight fit. And he wants to get the garage – we want to get the garage redone so we can fit more things in it with storage and stuff like that and we want to get heated floors.
He loves to wash the cars all the time. His family owns a car detailing shop so he’s really obsessive about our cars. So anyway, I’ve been kind of floating this idea of a winter car for the last year. Well then, my friend Lindsey Mango gets a new car, and she gets this luxury Mercedes and we’re driving around in it and I’m like, man, it would be so nice to also have this car.
I only have the experience of the rugged – my seats aren’t comfortable. They’re not meant to be. It’s a sports car. So I have that experience. And I don’t love driving the Q7. So I started thinking about it again, but again, it’s going to be a tight fit, we should get a third car maybe one day when we’re insanely rich and we have five-car garage and all the things.
And I just kind of kept being like, you know what, it’s not really for me. It’s not – a third car to me felt so extra. Extra’s not right, really the word. It’s more like just completely unnecessary. A waste of money. The thought was always like, who do you think you are?
So I’ve given you all the backstory now. So we go two days before Christmas because my tires, because I drive them so hard, needed to be replaced and we decided to get all weather tires on my car so that it does better in the winter and in the rain, whatever. So we’re dropping my car off at the Audi dealership and we walk in and I see this beautiful red car with a giant red sparkly bow on it.
And I look at Neil and I say, what is that? And we immediately go up – so here’s the other backstory to this is in my head, the other thing that was keeping me from getting the luxury car is that I would miss the experience of my sports car. One last thing about my sports car, the engine. When you turn it on, it growls, and I love it so much.
It feels like connecting with the inner just tiger in me or lion in me. It feels so powerful. So I love that sound, I love that sound when it makes when I speed up. I was like, I’ll miss that if I get a boring luxury car. I’ll miss that.
And so I see this car and we immediately go up to it and I’m like, looking at it. It looks kind of like their A7, which is their luxury car. But it’s really sporty. It’s a four-door, it’s definitely a sedan but it’s sporty, like, what’s happening here? And then we see the back and it says it’s a RS7. And he’s like, it’s like a mix of their sports car and their luxury car.
And as soon as we realized that we didn’t even talk to the people yet. I was like, what? I have to have this car. This is my car. This car is made for me. This car was made for me. It’s luxury and sports meet together. So we get in this car, we ask if we’re allowed to get in because I wasn’t sure about COVID.
So we get in the car and the entire – it looks like a Tesla on the inside. It’s so sleek, it has beautiful monitors, it’s all touch screen. Just very luxury inside, whereas my S5, you can just tell you’re in a sports car. And it’s all luxury. The seats are – they have a sporty look but they’re definitely bigger and wider and softer leather.
And I am just like, oh my god, this car. And the wheel isn’t a sports wheel. It’s a big luxury wheel. And I’m like, what is happening? This car is everything. And I’m looking at Neil and Neil knows this look that I have of like, oh no, we’re about to spend some money.
And I’m like, I love this car. So they start telling us about this car and I’m obsessed with this car and then they come over and tell us they’re ready for us to do the paperwork for our car. And I’m telling the guy that I’m obsessed with this car and I have to have this car.
Now, this guy probably hears people come into Audi and say I have to have this car all of the time, and I’m a girl and I’m young. He didn’t take it seriously at all. So we leave but Neil knows, Neil is very aware of when I am serious. So we go back home, I had a billion appointments that day. And I call Neil and I tell Neil, you need to call our salesperson, his name is Victor.
And I’m like, you have to call Victor and tell him that I want to test drive that car. And not only do I want to test drive that car, I want to test drive that car, meaning they need to pull it out of the show room. I don’t care how difficult that is. There was actually one in the parking lot and I was like, no, I want to drive the red one. The one I’m thinking about buying. I want to drive it. When we go pick up my car today, I want that car pulled out and we’re test driving it.
My loving fiancé knows me so well. He responded, “I’ve already called. It will be out waiting.” Seriously, what a sweetheart. So then I start texting my CFO. “Hey, can I spend this money?” And so I wanted to lease it. We like to lease, and we’ll talk about this in one of the lessons I learned, but I like to get new cars every three years. I love this concept.
So I told him how much I thought it would be. I just always love to run a purchase that by him and have him tell me it’s totally fine, even though I know it’s totally fine. Just feels like the adult thing to do to check with your CFO.
So I message him and then I call Neil back and I’m like, Mark is like, how fun. So I tell him that I told Mark how much I thought it was, he’s like, I already ran the numbers with him too. On it, you guys, Neil gets me. So this is lesson number one.
Everyone around me, everyone at the Audi dealership, you could tell there was this crazy buzz in the room because they don’t – I’m sure, they rarely interact with anyone making what they would kind of consider an impulsive big money decision. People don’t just come in and see a $140,000 car while they’re getting their – I think I said brakes earlier but tires. When they’re getting their tires changed. They don’t just do that. That doesn’t happen in the normal world.
And I know that it might seem reckless on the outside looking in, but for me, I think it’s strategic impulsiveness, meaning I have been thinking about it for a year, but I hadn’t found the thing that compelled me, that inspired me. And the moment I found the thing that met my needs, I didn’t need to think about it. I had been thinking about if for a year.
And so when the moment and the opportunity was there, it was like, let’s do this. Let’s make it happen. They couldn’t believe it. So then throughout the day, all of the drama starts coming up. And actually, I would say a lot of the drama started after we went and test drove it.
So we went and test drove it, amazing. So it has four driving modes. Comfort, which is the one that feels like you’re in a luxury car, and then it has dynamic, which is the sportier version that my S5 has, and then it has racing one and racing two, which is what Victor says the only time we would ever have that is when you’re actually racing it.
I’m like, who would actually do that? You guys don’t have to worry too much. I love my brain very much, I care for it now very well, I will not be racing it. So that was another thought of drama that I had, like I won’t be using the car – we’re going to talk about this in a second, but I won’t be using it for its full potential.
So we test drive the car, it’s amazing. And people are like, freaking out that we’re in here. So Victor tells us that everyone was asking who’s coming to test drive that car. So let me give you another backstory that this car apparently only gets made roughly every three years. It’s super rare. And very expensive and like, the car lovers, the car enthusiast, the car dudes of the world, they’ll all know what this car is. It’s a big deal.
And he said it’s actually the one car that will go up in value potentially next year because if it doesn’t get made again next year, the rarity of it actually makes it appreciate instead of depreciate, which is super fun. So we’re hearing all about it. So people are asking him who’s coming to drive this car.
And they’re like, it’s got to be some old rich dude, right? And Victor is just like, grinning from ear to ear because he’s a young guy, he thinks it’s the coolest thing ever and he’s like, no, it’s a young girl. So I’m getting there and I’m like, having this thought – it’s a very similar thought actually when I bought my S5.
We went and test drove an A5, which is their luxury non-sports version of their sports car or their convertible car and I was going to buy that car. We went to go fill out the paperwork and, on a whim, there was an S5 that looked so beautiful in their showroom I asked if they would pull it out and we could test drive it.
And I remember the first time I test drove an S5, which was several months before we actually bought it, I remember when I turned the engine on and it growled, I felt like it was too much for me. I couldn’t handle that kind of car and that it was a dude’s car, and it was dude energy.
And then six months later I made a million dollars, and the car was so beautiful, I have him pull it out of the showroom and I test drive it and I turn that car on, and I hear the roar and it hits me completely differently. I feel as if it is literally bringing out this roar in my soul and I am meeting its power with my inner power. That’s how it really felt.
And I wasn’t intimidated by it at all, and it showed my own growth in my self-concept and the way that I feel about myself and the power that I feel on a daily basis to match this car’s energy. So the same thing starts happening.
So they’re talking about how rare this car is, we turn it on, the engine is – it growls 10 times louder than my S5. It’s my favorite thing about it. I love the growl. I turn it on but they’re talking about how rare it is, how this super rich old guy ordered it before COVID and then freaked out with COVID and thought he might die and decided he didn’t want to buy it anymore and it’s the only reason why Louisville even had it completely custom made.
There was another one that was pre-sold in the shop and it was a billionaire who had bought it and they’re talking about how this car is either going to me, I’m buying it, or they’re in talks with an NBA player who might also buy it. So I’m having all these thoughts swirling and I’m feeling all this. I start to feel like I’m shrinking in the sales floor.
I’m seeing myself the way other people see me, this little girl getting this car. And I really had to step my self-concept up to wait a minute, Neil kept saying you have every right to have this car, you have every right to drive this car. This car is who you are.
And I’m texting my best friend Lindsay Dotzlaf and I’m like, texting back and forth and she’s like, obviously this is your car and obviously this is who you are and duh, you make professional athlete money. So I’m going to tell you about lesson two and three kind of together.
So lesson three technically is – are you ready for it? Because I’ve rambled for a little bit but it’s a really good lesson. Ready? Life coaches can make what NBA players make. What? You fucking kidding me? That’s the game we’re playing.
Are you ready? We can make as much money as NBA players, as professional athletes. I remember when I told Neil that I wanted to make a million dollars in a year and he was like, I mean, that’s professional athlete money. The smallest percentage of the smallest percentage of the world can do that.
That’s what we can do. Life coaching is no longer this thing your neighbor does as a hobby, as a little jobbie on the side. You can make NBA player money as a life coach. That blew my mind. What? Me and an NBA player, one of us is getting this car. And I was like, listen, that NBA player is not getting this car. I’m getting this car.
I just think the idea of that, a life coach. I can’t spend enough time on it. It literally blows my mind. So that was lesson three. So lesson two, I’m going to go back to that one. Lesson two is I had to really step into the idea that – I don’t even want to say the idea. It’s been around for years. The idea that women can have and want what men have. But more like I almost felt shame for what I felt like was this masculine thing of buying this sports car.
Like sports cars are for men. It’s a masculine energy to want to drive fast and to be into sports car and to care about cars. All of that, that’s men’s stuff, right? Imagine a Neanderthal banging his chest. And I’ve encountered this a lot. I ran a Facebook ad, you guys may have remembered the story, a year ago where I was on a private plane with some other women coaches and it got so much hate.
And men can have a photo on a Facebook ad riding in a private plane and no one bats an eye. But for some reason, in our society, I say some reason, there are many reasons, but in our society, I think that women talking about money and making money and spending money and having masculine energy comes off sometimes as offensive and I felt the weight of that.
I felt almost like I was a little girl, and an adult was telling me that’s not very ladylike. That’s kind of what I was going through is this it’s not a ladylike thing to do and there are a lot of coaches, a lot of female coaches in the industry, and I think this is the most amazing thing ever, that are really embodying their feminine energy to make money and to sell.
But I am in my feminine energy – we could have a whole talk about feminine and masculine energy. I studied it a lot early on, my first few years of coaching. And we could also just say energy is energy. I think men embody masculine and feminine energy, women embody masculine and feminine energy.
But to be a successful coach as a woman, embodying what I would say could be labeled as masculine energy felt taboo for some reason. Felt like – I had this thought like if I’m a woman coach, I need to embody feminine energy and I need to show women how they can make money with their feminine energy and I need to be more feminine to embody that to really show what women can have with success.
All of this is going through my mind over the day, being at the dealership, literally there was one part where Neil looked at me and was like, your energy has really dropped. And I’m just going through it in my mind. And it was the first time I really decided it’s okay. I don’t need my clients to match my masculine energy, but it is okay for me to be in that.
If I like masculine things, that’s okay. I can talk about buying sports cars and I, in my mind, assume a lot of my female clients won’t be into that, which is again, my patriarchal beliefs as well coming out. So many of you messaged me and said you were totally into it and were so inspired.
And even if that wouldn’t be the dream thing you would do with your money, it’s okay for me to have that, to be that. I spend so much – I am so in my feminine energy in my relationship, I really enjoy being in my masculine energy, and when I say that, I mean control and power and strength.
I love being in that very action, aggressive, kind of bossy energy. I love that in my business, I love that when I’m driving, and it’s okay for me to be in that and it’s okay for me to talk about money, it’s okay for me to talk about making money, and it’s okay for me to spend money and to spend it on something like a rare sports car. I can do that. It’s not a problem.
And so that, to me, was really transformational of that’s the energy I’m going to bring and that energy is okay. And it’s just as okay as a female thought leader just making money with feminine energy and being really feminine in her business. It’s okay to be who I am and even if it’s not – even if other coaches don’t necessarily identify with that, I don’t have to hide it in the world.
I felt almost a little shame of buying the car for just – until I worked through these thoughts. So you do hear me say this a lot, that we can have money, we can make money, we can talk about money, we can spend money, we can love fast cars. And so that’s who I’m going to be and I’m going to be in that energy. That is who I am, and I love it about it.
So number one was strategic impulsiveness. It’s not the same as reckless. It’s just thinking about something for a long time and waiting until you’re ready and you’re compelled to take action. Number two is women can have and want what men have, embody their masculine energy, talk about money, making money, spending money, all of that, and it doesn’t have to be offensive. And life coaches, number three, can make money the same way, as much money as an NBA player. Professional athlete money.
So number four, while all of this is going on, I also have this thought about my family and what my family’s going to think about me and what other people are going to think about me, what my coach is going to think about me, what everybody’s going to think about this third car purchase and how utterly unnecessary and ridiculous it is, and we don’t need it and we live in Kentucky. Who has three cars in Kentucky?
I can imagine if we were in LA having three cars. That’s what people in LA do. But people in Kentucky a little more middle class or a little more humble. I still think about what our neighbors think when we pull in and they see our car. They have got to be like, what is going on over there?
So there was a lot of thoughts about how I spend my discretionary money. And then on top of that, there was a lot of thoughts about – so this is the first time that I really broke down like, I was talking to the guy that does the finances and I was talking about what’s the actual cost of leasing a car.
So at Audi, they actually let you buy the car after your lease is up if you want, as if you would have bought it that same day that you leased it. And the money that wasn’t part of the leasing fee would go towards the buying it. So you wouldn’t lose any money on the buying part of it, other than the money you spent on the lease.
So I was asking him how much money the lease was and it’s like $500 a month in just the leasing portion, just to lease it. That’s the fee. And then on top of, you pay some of the money. So it’s like, I don’t know, $2500 a month total. So $2000 of that goes towards the car’s value, I’m not describing this correctly or in the right terms, and then $500 of that is the lease.
And actually, I think a couple hundred of it is like, different – what do you call it? When you can take it in and get it serviced and all of that. Different options to have on your car. Different warrantees and stuff like that and we got all the stuff since we have dogs.
So I was sitting there thinking okay, so $500 a month times – that’s $6000. It’s close to $20,000 a year just to lease this car. Not counting – and we would spend a total of $90,000 driving it over three years. And if you explain that to someone who’s not an entrepreneur who isn’t rich, who doesn’t have tons and tons of discretionary money, that seems insane to waste $90,000.
But it’s really not wasting $90,000. It’s not wasting it for a second. I love this car so much I’m going to get $90,000 worth of enjoyment, even if it doesn’t make financial sense to other people. It really made – not financial sense but it made sense to me. It made happiness sense to me.
And then I really thought about we don’t have to make only logical, smart, and responsible financial decisions. We don’t have to do that. To me, when you only make logical, smart, responsible decisions, you have to be careful of where that comes from.
Does it come from a desire to do that and it feeling really good and healthy and happy and like your best – the most abundant thing for you to do, or does it come from scarcity of money is hard and it doesn’t come very often, and it doesn’t grow on trees and it’s hard to make and it’s hard to get and it’s hard to hold?
When it comes from that lack of it may not be there in the future, you can spend large amounts of discretionary money in a discretionary way. Is that the word? In a discretionary way. I can spend $90,000 on something that isn’t an investment, that doesn’t appreciate. I’m not even considering that’s a thing because I would have to buy the car anyway to make that count.
So it’s okay to spend 90K. It’s okay to book a private flight. You can spend – you really get to spend your money how you want to spend your money, especially when you have lots of it left over. I had to really coach myself on this, that even if it doesn’t make financial sense, it doesn’t have to. It’s okay.
And then the tail end of that is it’s also okay to have more than enough. It’s okay to have a third car in Kentucky. Everyone was like, “Oh my god, you got rid of your sports car.” I’m like, “No, I have that too.” I’m going to drive that in the summer still. It’s okay.
Do we need it? Of course not. Do we want it? Hell yeah. Can we have it? Hell yeah. So you can have and buy what you don’t need and spend your discretionary income on what you want, even if it doesn’t make financial sense.
Lesson five was an interesting thought that came up and I wanted to bring it up in case you guys ever have this thought. It presented to me in my head but also, I’ve seen it kind of out in the world recently over Christmas. So I had this thought, I’m sitting here, and Victor brings up this guy who was afraid of COVID and didn’t want to spend a bunch of money if he wasn’t going to survive COVID.
I was thinking about Neil and I have spent a lot of time talking about and thinking about and empathizing with the brick-and-mortar business owners and the people that have been put out of work with this pandemic and it hasn’t been lost on us the great fortune of having a virtual business.
And I talk about all the time if the pandemic had happened seven years ago, I would have been living in a 600 square foot apartment with a semi-abusive partner. I would not have been able to pitch during the pandemic at all so I wouldn’t have been working all year. We were often living paycheck to paycheck. Sometimes he wasn’t working at all.
And I would have been locked in that tiny apartment, stuck there all year with no money in a really tense abusive situation. And so we talk about it all the time, how incredibly fortunate we are, and we have donated money to help people, business owners who are not. And it has really been something that we have not taken lightly.
So I’m sitting here and I’m asking them about the business that they’ve had during COVID. Has it slowed down? He was like, actually, we’ve actually kind of been busier. So I had this thought that rich people get richer while poor people get poorer. It’s a thought that a lot of people put out into the world.
And it’s a thought that implies that rich people get rich from poor people. And there might be some truth to that if you broke it down in the sense that for example, coaches who pay me money who aren’t making as much money as me, that as I make more and more money, I’m making money off of coaches who don’t make as much money as me. Or the same could be said for you and your clients.
But I really thought about – it was such an interesting thought for me to have to feel guilty about buying this car during the pandemic while I know there are people out there who are suffering. Again, who we have actually donated money to. We’ve actually donated more money this year than ever before.
But I had this other quiet thought peep up in the back of my mind that said, how did they get richer? And my answer was my growing their compounding ability to create more value. By making more valuable decisions, by producing more value in the world.
So for example, yes, I may have gotten richer in this pandemic, but my students have made far more money than I have combined. They’ve made far more money than they’re paid me. Even my 2K students, they make 2K, they go on to make 30K, 50K, 100K. I still have some of my 200K earners who are making 200K and 300K that pop into 2K and re-watch the videos and participate in the community.
So that statement, even if it could be skewed in some way shape or form as true is really unuseful. I talked about this in thoughts about rich people where it’s like, if you think about their richness as taking away from your ability to get rich, if you judge them, if you think that they’re the reason that you are where you are, you miss the opportunity to figure out the value they created.
So it was really interesting for me to have that come up and then land on that truth that part of the people who made money in this pandemic is because for whatever reason, the economy shifted in their direction. For example, Zoom or Slack. The economy shifted in that direction. Or people who innovated. People who owned restaurants who started doing delivery services and things like that.
So people either innovated, or their product services and value and is where the economy shifted and what the economy needed during this time. There’s a whole work force now of people who are doing grocery shopping. Neil complains about the Amazon people and Whole Foods all the time. I’m like, that is the most elitist complaint ever.
It’s like, a definite rich people problem to be talking about the Amazon shoppers at Whole Foods. To be fair though, he loves to pick out all the food himself. So anyway, he gets annoyed – I don’t even know why.
Anyway, the value really has shifted. And so it’s interesting to really say okay, so actually what created that versus this thought that keeps getting fueled into our society that really just makes poor people hate rich people and never try to figure out how to get rich because you’re never going to want to be who you hate.
What’s really interesting is I had someone during Christmas break that I was spending time with that was telling me a story about being on a Disney cruise and they said when they left, they just had to wash all the privilege off of them, from how expensive the cruise was and all those people that had that kind of money to just blow on a Disney cruise. Not to mention they were the ones also on the Disney cruise.
But I had this thought of like, it’s so interesting. Some people would say I need to wash the privilege off of me, and then I would have said, wow, I wonder what all these people do, what’s the value they’re creating in the world. I’m just curious all the different ways to create value.
So I’m always thinking about that. When I am staying a five-star hotel and I’m surrounded by people who have to be able to fork out $1000 a night at a hotel room, I’m never thinking like, look at all of us rich people getting rich while the poor get poorer, look at all of us privileged people. I’m always thinking, I wonder what value they create, I wonder how they create value, I wonder what they do for a living.
It’s so interesting to me all the opportunity to create value and how many people are really out there doing that, learning how to – inventing products or creating companies or running companies. And the more I think – the more that you expose yourself to that, the more it becomes normal. You normalize it and the more available it is to you.
So the last lesson, number six that I had to get over in order to – this was really after I bought the car that this started coming up, but it was while I was there buying it and then after the fact. And once I got over this, I’ve been loving and enjoying my car, but also my mindset around money feels so changed.
So number six, so everyone was telling me how rare this car is and how exclusive it is, and they started talking about – there was a couple comments at the dealership about how rare it is and about driving it. But I think the one that stood out to me was actually when we called our insurance.
They were asking us how many miles we thought we would drive it every year. And the insurance guy told Neil like, about 10,000, right? And Neil kind of said it back to me and I said, what? So much more than that. I don’t know but definitely more than that. We’re going to drive it a lot. And he was so shocked by that.
And when we talked about driving it, we, for example, we brought it home and two days later we had to take two cars because we couldn’t fit all the Christmas gifts and our dogs and all of our luggage in one car to see our family. So we had to drive two cars. So I drove this brand-new rare sports car in a snowstorm.
And it was like, covered in filth and gunk and snow whenever I got there, and it already has 500 miles on it, and we’ve had it a couple weeks. And I was feeling so much shame about how I’m – first of all, I’m not going to use it to its max potential because I’m not going to race it. And maybe – what if I don’t appreciate it the way a car enthusiast will appreciate it?
I won’t understand its true potential, mixed with I’m going to not keep this a rare car. Who am I to have a winter car that’s this rare car that I’m going to drive around just like it’s my car? And I realized after a while of unwinding that that I love rare things and I want to use them to their maximum potential.
And using them to their max potential, realizing their potential is driving it, using it, right? Just like an amazing handbag. I don’t want to just stare at it in my closet. I want to put things in it and take it out into the world. I don’t want to just have material things and look at them. I want to incorporate them and use them into my life.
And I really feel like it’s because I create my thoughts and feelings without them, so if I have them, I don’t need them to be pristine and unused and rare to still feel about them the same way that I would if they were unused and brand new. I want to experience them.
Just like I want to experience my life to its greatest potential. I want to get the most out of it that I possibly can. And then I started thinking I want to experience my money to its maximum potential. So that will always look like spending a lot of money to other people. But to me, it’s more like I’m using my money.
And I also use it to have in my account for abundance and business decisions and I use it to invest in employees and we used it this year to pay off our house. And I use it to create opportunities, and I use it to save for future opportunities as well and I use it to think about retirement.
I use it in ways that are “responsible” as well, but I want to use my money. I want to use it and enjoy it while I have it. I don’t want to hold onto it. I don’t feel this deep need to become this multi-billionaire and be the richest person in the world. I don’t have that desire now. I have the desire to experience my life and use money to help me do that and to experience the things I buy with my money.
So it’s very interesting. I think about it all the time. Every time I drive this car, I’m like, some car enthusiast is rolling over right now in their metaphorical grave about me driving this car and getting groceries in it and using it to pick up food at Chipotle. But I love it and it makes me happy.
And the fact that it’s rare, who cares? I love it. It really felt when I saw it like it was a car that was made for me. It was my car. It was everything I wanted. Turns out that just happens to be some rare thing and it’s okay for me to drive it more than 10,000 miles a year. I don’t have to leave it in the garage, I can drive it in the rain, I can drive it in the snow.
Neil was joking about my wheels and how I drive my car. What’s so interesting by the way is we took my sports car out. We had to take the new RS7 to get this paint treatment after Christmas and so we dropped it off and we went to go pick it up in my S5. And I hadn’t driven it in like, I don’t know, six days at this point, eight days.
And I enjoyed, even though it was the winter, every second of taking turns fast, of speeding up, I love my car. And so Neil was giving me a hard time because I’m hard on my car. He was like, you know, you could drive this car a little more carefully and then he’s like, well, I guess it’s only yours for three years, so it doesn’t matter anyway.
And I’m like, yeah, I drive this car hard. I’m going to use all of it. All of its potential is going to get used with me. And then I started thinking about I know it’s a material thing, and I’m like, but that honors the car more than it sitting in a garage. Seriously.
So those are my – I just wanted to tell you all of my lessons and pass them on to you, all the ones you might want to take, all of the ones that might have inspired you. If you have been thinking about something and you find the right thing and you decide it’s for you, it’s not reckless or a bad version of impulsive to just jump on it. It’s strategic impulsiveness.
And if you have really feminine energy in your business or in your life and you really are – someone was posting in 2K today that they read my timeline of success. I sent an email out chronicalizing the timeline of all the things that happened over the last seven years for me and she said I was thinking I can’t take all these trips and do all these retreats, I’m a mom.
But it’s okay for her and she came to this conclusion herself, but it’s okay that her story will look different and her experience will look different and what her business looks like will look different. It doesn’t have to look like mine.
So whether it’s a very feminine approach or if you’re a woman who has really masculine energy like me, that’s okay too. You can be abrasive, you could be loud, you could talk about making money, you can talk about spending money, and you can drive, buy sports cars, do it.
And remember that we can make the same money as NBA players or NFL players or all the professional athletes. Life coaches are now making that kind of money. You can have and buy what you don’t need. Rich people get richer by creating more value. And I love rare things. You can love rare things too and you can use rare things.
There’s no police. You can wear a really rare purse, a very expensive purse, you can wear expensive shoes, you can do whatever you want. Once you buy those things, use them up. Use them to their potential. And also if you like to stare at them.
I have two life coach friends and we’re on a thread and we just talk about all the shit we buy. And my two friends love to buy antiques and antique jewelry or vintage jewelry and vintage things and it’s like, you just want to look at stuff, if you like art, that’s okay too. Use your money, use your things, use your potential and your life.
Okay, those are my lessons. I hope they were helpful. Otherwise you just got to hear a really long story about me buying a sports car. That’s fine too. Alright, have an amazing week y’all. Love you so much and I’ll talk to you next week.
Hey, if you’re ready to make money as a life coach, I want to invite you to join my 2k for 2k program where you’re going to make your first $2,000 the hardest part using my simple 5 step formula for getting consults and closing new clients. Just head over to www.staceyboehman.com/2kfor2k. We’ll see you inside.