#323: Capacity Work

Welcome to the Make Money as a Life Coach® podcast where sales expert and Master Coach Stacey Boehman teaches you how to make your first $2K, $20K, and $200K using her proven formula.

Stacey Boehman: Hi, coaches. Welcome to Episode 323. Today has been the most beautiful day. I have spent, actually the last two days have been so incredible. I feel almost emotional. We just finished our final live, Alive call from my Entrepreneur Series course. And so the last two days have been our final two calls and they have just been something of magic. That’s all I can say.

I have been told many times by many people that this was my best ever work. But I have to tell you, I’m just getting started. I do not plan on this being the best ever thing I’ve ever done. I just really am getting out 10 years worth of knowledge and experience and out into the Entrepreneur Series courses. And it’s truly like, I mean, not to be like, I don’t know what the word is, but like campy or whatever. But like I really do feel so alive right now with this work and I’m so excited to be delivering it to people.

So we had an amazing call. I also got to coach my 200K and my 2 Million Dollar Group this week and we had amazing calls and I’m just feeling really alive, y’all. So energized and I’m about to leave for vacation. Tomorrow morning I’m going to Miami for eight full, beautiful days in the sun. And in Alive, one of the things I taught my students is something called a Triumph Story. And they’ve all been writing their Triumph Stories. I gave them very specific instructions for this. And I am going to be just like sitting at the pool reading all of their Triumph Stories, which are the best ever. So just having a really great day.

And the last thing I do before I go on vacation is record this podcast for you. So one of the things today on our last call of Alive and as the time of release, this will release live this version of the podcast on March 5th. If you are dying to get in Alive and you’re sad that you missed out, you can still do that. You can go to https://staceyboehman.com/alive and you will still have until March 14th. So you’re going to have a full week and a half still to go through the six trainings. So you’ll have plenty of time. You’ll still be able to join the Facebook group.

Everything will be open until March 14th. So you can still join us and still have this infusion into your life. So I will tell you that. But one of the things that I did on the final Alive call is I announced the next Entrepreneur Series course. And this is what I told them that I want to tell you.

There has been one podcast episode that since last July, my team and I have personally recommended to individual students more times than any podcast ever in the history of this podcast. I am telling people as I’m coaching them in 2K, in 200K, in 2 Million Dollar Group, in all of my core offers, weekly, I’m telling someone, go listen to this podcast.

In the comments of all of my Facebook groups, when I’m individually coaching people, I’m telling them, oh, you’ve got to listen to this podcast. We are sending it out in customer service responses. It has been just the podcast that everyone needs to hear, everyone needs to study, everyone needs to apply into their lives. Not just their business, their lives, all of them.

And I decided because I keep, since last July, telling people, you’ve got to listen to this episode. And then they’ll tell me, I’ve listened to this episode and it was so amazing and I listened to it twice. I’m like, okay, listen again from this angle. Like it’s been so important to my students, to their work, and it’s been such a big part of my journey in the last 10 years, but specifically the last year that I decided I had to turn it into its own Entrepreneur Series course and that’s what I’m going to do next.

And by now you might have guessed it based on the title of this episode, but the next Entrepreneur Series course is Capacity Work. And that podcast that I’ve been telling everyone to go listen to is the episode titled, “Increasing Your Capacity and Your Capability.”

And in that episode, I give a very detailed explanation of the work that I did last year when I took over my company’s operations and management and restructured my company and dropped $6 million of expenses in about a 12-month period and was managing all of my current client load and also working to increase my profit, and also launching the Entrepreneur Series, and 2K for 2K Live, and the 200K Mastermind Unbundle.

I was Superwoman last year, and then this year, it’s like whatever version of bigger than superwoman is. And there’s just nothing that can stop me. That is my full belief. I feel truly alive and very invincible in the best way. Not physically invincible. I never feel physically invincible. I’m about to fly and I’m terrified. But I feel emotionally invincible.

And so I want to do capacity work with my students in a container where that’s all we work on. I wanna help you expand your inner capacity to become a new version of yourself who is much more capable of stewarding much bigger things in your life and your business. Like really think about if you feel kind of capped at your capacity to take on new things, to do more, to coach more people, to hold more space.

I also recorded an episode on the eight emotional capacities of a millionaire. We’re gonna be talking about all of this, like all the different ways you can approach capacity work, we’re going to be doing that in this container. I really want to help you bring forth new levels of energy. Like everyone keeps telling me, Stacey, your energy is through the roof. I want that. Capacity work is how I’ve done it. It’s one of the big pieces of the puzzle. It’s not the only piece.

All of these Entrepreneur Series courses are part of that. Served was how I reconnected back to my audience and really got back to my mission and my purpose. Alive was how I stepped up to the challenge to really bring myself back after my maternity leave and after being really like experiencing a lot of online hate and really going through a really tumultuous phase of my business. And capacity work has really been the thing that’s like allowed me to step into all of this. To believe in new potential for myself, I want to pass that on to you.

Like a next level of potential is inside of you and you have to tap into it. You have to bring it up as if the reserves are already in you and inside of you. And I want to help you show up bigger than you have ever shown up before. I want you to imagine learning how to go all in without hustling or burning out. I was just coaching a 2 Million Dollar Group student on this. He was like, how do I go all in without hustling and burning out? And we’re gonna talk about that.

I said, great news, that’s what we’re gonna do in Capacity Work. I’m gonna really help you do that, not on a theoretical level, we’re going to on an experiential level. And I really, if you have the fear of burning out, I really want you to join this container because we are going to let that go. I want you to be able to expand all the way into your full powerful self.

This is going to be an energetic space to learn to experience and hold bigger emotions, to be able to recognize. So many of my students just struggle with recognizing wins and then to celebrate them, and to be in the win, and the joy, and then compound that, and really just become superhuman in your response to your business and your clients.

I’m going to guide you to start expanding your capacity in the container. So this isn’t like all of these Entrepreneur Series courses. We do the work in the container so that I can coach you through the middle part. That is where the breakthrough happens. That is where you learn to have that greater capacity from that moment forward.

Burning out is, I expended a lot of willpower and energy, but then I lost it and I got myself sick and I had to take care of myself. And now I’m starting from the bottom again. Expanding your capacity is now I am a version of me who can take on more than I’ve ever been able to take on before permanently, and I still have energy.

I’m doing more in my business than I ever have in the history of my business, but I have so much energy for it. I just get all of my work done. I do it all with such vigor and excitement. I’m looking forward to every part of my year and every single thing I’m gonna do and anything that comes my way from this moment on, I know I have the intellectual capacity, I have the emotional capacity, I have the physical energetic capacity.

Every version of the capacity inside of me, I have. My energy is not holding me back. My time is not holding me back. My emotions, the emotions that I could experience aren’t holding me back. And I’m capitalizing on the wins and magnetizing people to me in that process. I’m gonna teach you how I’ve been doing this. I’m going to teach you how I have done this so many times in my business.

It’s not just like in the hard times, it’s the whole point or the whole process of how I created my three-day work week. How do you go from being at multiple six figures and feeling like you’re at your max with your time and your energy and there’s nothing left of, to you to I run an eight-figure business in three days a week. And back then at multiple six figures, I was working five days a week, sometimes six days a week. How do you do that? You learn how to work with capacity. You learn how to grow your own capacity.

So that’s what we’re doing in the next Entrepreneur Series course. You can join me at staceyboehman.com/capacitywork. We start March 17th. So there’s gonna be plenty of time before access ends on March 14th for Alive. So as soon as access ends, just a couple of days later, we’re going to start with Capacity Work. This won’t be the case for all of these Entrepreneur Series, but I really love having these two back to back.

If you weren’t in Aive, it’s not gonna be a problem. These were created to do and need to different client paths. There’s the client path that is on board to do this curated path with me, where you take every single Entrepreneur Series course and you just watch that work compound. They’ve also been created for the person who says, that’s the work I’ve been dying to do. That’s what I know I need. This is the container for me. And so either is the journey, like whatever it is for you, just make sure you get in.

And I’m offering an early bird special. So I told you I’m going on vacation for eight days and I will not be marketing Capacity Work. I’m going to start marketing Capacity Work when I get back, and to the whole public and to my social media platforms and to my email list and to everywhere. But if you are a podcast listener and you are up to date on the podcast or you just happen to listen to this one and it’s your lucky day, we do have a early bird special. You’ll get $50 off the price of admission of the course by signing up early, and you can use the code capacity50.

This will expire, so if it doesn’t work and you try to sign up, it’s just because the early bird special has ended and it will end the moment I start publicly marketing this course. So again, you can go to staceyboehman.com/capacitywork and you can enter in capacity50 to get $50 off your next or your first Entrepreneur Series course.

This will be a two-week deep dive with me followed by an additional two weeks of access so that you can catch up. If you’re not able to make all the calls, like they are limited courses. We don’t offer them as lifetime access. It’s how we’re able to keep the investment so low, but I do give you plenty of time. We do three calls a week, each of the weeks. So there’s so much time in between to integrate. And they’re not even three straight days. I only coach on Mondays, typically Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays. So that’s what we’re doing right now is adding those in.

So you’re going to have time to integrate. You’re going to have time to catch up. You’re going to have time to catch up, you’re going to have time to do this work, but we want you to do it in the container because these are where the transformations are truly happening.

Now I also thought if you haven’t listened to the episode that I have been sending out to the whole world on increasing your capacity and your capability and you’re like, “Oh I’m gonna have to go search for that.” You don’t have to go search for it. If you keep listening, we’re going to play that replay next and if you have listened but you need to listen to it from this space, please do. I just listened to it myself this morning. And it is a masterclass in and of itself, but I’m gonna take that 47 minutes and we’re gonna dive in for six straight classes.

I’m gonna be able to add things that have come up since then, things I’ve coached people on, things I’ve learned since then, more of the emotional work side of growing your capacity. There’s so many things I’m going to be able to add in with having its own container. So I’m so excited to do this work with you. So that is Capacity Work, our next Entrepreneur Series course starting March 17th.

Sign up with the early bird at staceyboehman.com/capacity work with your code capacity50. In order to get the early bird special, you’ll need to sign up by March 9th at midnight, which is a Sunday night. So March 9th by midnight, I open it up to the public on the 10th. Now you can stay tuned for increasing your capacity and your capability. This is one of my favorite all-time episodes I’ve ever recorded. I hope you enjoy.

Today we’re going to talk about increasing your capacity, your capability, and your potential. So I’ve been teaching a lot on this in the last six months, especially because I’ve been in a deep space of challenging my own capacity, capability, and potential. And I’m using these three words because I have been using capacity when I’ve been teaching this the most and then it kind of switched to capability, and I was thinking about like aren’t those kind of the same?

So then I looked up the definition of all three of them, like what they mean as individual things. So if you look up the definition of capable, it’s having the ability, fitness or quality necessary to do or achieve a specific thing. So this could be like, I am capable of signing a coaching client. I am capable of getting paid. I am capable of coaching someone. Right? Having the ability to achieve efficiently whatever one has to do. That’s the second definition of it, which I thought was interesting because that’s where I think capacity comes in.

Capacity is the ability to achieve something. I believe in my experience, not even looking at the definition, it’s to be able to achieve something greater and greater and greater, to be able to do something more and more efficiently. When I looked at the definition for capacity, it was the maximum amount that something can contain. And then the second definition was the amount that something can produce.

So there’s the amount you can produce and then it’s almost like inside of the amount of what you can produce, then there is the ability to produce something well. Right? There’s the efficiency, there’s the amount you can produce, and then there’s the skill at which you produce, and what exactly you do produce, the skills you do.

And one of the things that keeps all of my students from growing, all of us as humans from growing and reaching our potential or reaching a potential available to us is our belief of our capability and our capacity to take on greater capability. So then I was scrolling through all the definitions like the deep dive of the definitions and in one of them, in the amount that something can produce a similar word came up of potential, and so then I looked at, okay, what’s potential mean, what’s the definition? It’s having or showing the capacity to become or develop into something in the future.

So if we want to have greater capacity or greater potential to develop into something in the future, the thing we have to challenge is our belief in our capacity and our capability to challenge it. I’m going to explain this in like using all three words in a way that I think will be really useful. I’ve been coaching a lot of my 2 Million Dollar Group students. I’ll give you an example. I’ve been coaching a lot of them on their belief that they have the capacity to make a million dollars. The energetic capacity, because anytime you have a big goal, and this is even if it’s like I’m going to start my business, the first thing your brain wants to tell you is I don’t have the energy to do that. I don’t have the capacity. I work full time. I have kids. I have a busy life. There’s no time left over. There’s no capacity to do this.

Or sometimes our brain tells us, I don’t have the intellectual capacity. Like I don’t believe I could learn this very intricate skill set. Maybe it’s sales, maybe it’s marketing. For me right now, I’m working on… one of my goals is to bring my ads in-house and have us just run them and never work with an ads manager again. I love that I’m facing this challenge now and not earlier. I teach this. I teach delaying that challenge as long as possible because I think there are so many other things that you could be working on. I have spent the last 10 years just challenging and increasing my skill sets in organic marketing, in selling, in delivering. And those three things have taken all of my energy and focus. But now I feel like I know there are definitely different levels of the skill, but I’ve really run into the point after 10 years and $30 million of sales, I’ve really felt like I’ve run into the point where I can 100% keep selling and making money with the tools I have. But I recognize if I want to go to the next level, I have to figure out selling through ads and funnels at a new level and I keep running into issues with ad managers that just can’t take me there.

And instead of like finding the perfect ad manager, now I’m ready to be the ads manager. Like that feels like the next thing available for me to really go to the next level is if I could do their job. That’s my thought. I could do this job. I have the capability to learn this job and the capacity to take it on.

I’ve done this earlier this year with taking over my business operations and management of my employees and my company, which was two people’s full-time jobs that now I do on top of my job as the CEO and head of marketing, head of sales, head of delivery, full-time coach, head visionary, strategizer, head budgeter, and moneymaker, all of those jobs. Now it’s also head manager and head person making decisions around operations.

Now I do have an amazing person that is working for me as like kind of a fractional COO, but even in that I’ve made sure I’m a part of everything, every meeting, every decision, every planning session. I’m the one really overseeing the decisions and I need to be. That’s what I think is also my next level.

And so to take on all of these jobs on top of the ones I already have, it used to be a three-day work week. Now it’s like constantly changing, so I almost don’t even feel an integrity to say it’s a three-day work week anymore. It’s more like a five-day work week, using all of my child’s nap times and then also three days of full-time work. It’s like a weird mix. We get a two- to three-hour nap every day and I go ham during those hours. And then I also work other hours throughout the week. But it allows me to be even more flexible and take my kid to his little toddler classes that we do and go to the park on days. And so now I will just say it’s probably more like a 15 to 20-hour work week. So it requires a deep amount of challenging my capability and my capacity and accessing a new level of potential inside of myself.

Okay, so that’s kind of the opening. I want to deep dive in and I’m going to really walk you through what I call a capability or capacity challenge. What you need to know, thoughts to think to help you do this, to increase your capability and your capacity for more. Whether it’s your capacity to coach more people in a container, to go from 10 people to 30 people, to go from 30 people to 100 people, from 100 people to 1,000 people. Maybe it’s your capacity to make more money, to go from $300K to $1 million, or your capability to become better at sales and increase your conversion rates, whatever it is.

Okay. So this is the first way I want you to think about it. And I’ve titled this increasing. The way I refer to it is increasing my capacity because I think that that’s what people understand and that’s the way they would frame the problem. When I’m coaching people, that is typically the way they say, I just don’t have the capacity, and we’re talking about increasing it.

But another way to think about it is challenging it. Okay, so when you’re like, I want to increase my capability or I want to increase my capacity, I want to be able to do something that I can’t currently do, or I want to be able to do more or get more results from my energetic or physical time. If I want to do that, what I really have to do is challenge it. I have to challenge my capacity. I have to challenge my capability.

And the reason I really love challenging it in order to increase it is because you are really challenging your brain’s thoughts about it. Your brain’s thoughts about your capacity. Your brain’s thoughts about your capability. You’re challenging your brain’s thoughts about your capacity and what you are capable of taking on.

And I think you’re doing this for four kind of major areas. So you might be challenging your brain’s thoughts about your capacity and what you’re capable of taking on intellectually, tangibly with a skill.

It could be with volume and production of work, and/or in all of these cases, it’s challenging what we are capable of and what our capacity is energetically. Because that’s typically what we say, I don’t have the energy for that. I don’t have the stamina for that. I don’t have the time for that. And anytime we say we don’t have the time, really what we’re saying is we don’t have the energy, right? Because how we use our time and what gets done in the time we have has to do with the energy we bring to it.

Okay, so let’s break this down. So intellectually, this might be you believing I am capable of learning this thing, right? Like when I think of an intellectual capacity issue, it’s like I don’t have the capacity to be smarter. I don’t have the availability inside of my body and in my brain to be smart enough to understand this or learn this or I don’t have the ability, enough information and resourcefulness inside of me and knowledge inside of me to make these decisions or to think through this.

Any of the ways it shows up like that, like these are the ways it kind of shows up for me is all my brain will say I’m not smart enough to learn this or I don’t have enough knowledge to make this decision, or I’m not capable of making this decision, or I literally don’t have the smarts to think this through. Especially like when I think about ads, anything that has to do with technology, my brain wants to short circuit.

Even when we did our data study, I mean, I cannot tell you how many questions and how many hours and conversations that Patrick and I had for me to understand the numbers and what he was telling me and to understand how he ran the data because like every time he starts talking at his level, which is like extraordinarily high, my brain would want to check out and be like, I’m not smart enough to understand this and I’m not a data person and I am not a tech person.”

And when he would talk about like all the software that  was used to run the study, it was like my brain just wanted to completely check out. And I had to constantly challenge my ability to stay in that level of intellectual conversation. My brain used to do this with money and budgeting and money management and like learning my P&L. I went last November to a good friend’s house and her husband used to be I think a COO, CFO of a huge fast food chain. And I went in knowing it was going to be a very hard day because I was going to be challenging my capability to look at the numbers and look at a P&L and understand four different viewpoints of a P&L and to really become an expert at it, to become very proficient in it.

I always wanted to just delegate that out to bookkeepers. That’s what they do. That’s what they do. Except they kept making mistakes. No matter how many I worked with, that would cost me lots of money. So I had to choose to challenge my intellectual capacity to be capable of looking at a P&L and knowing how to use that to guide my business decisions or to be able to have a conversation with a neuroscientist who has become a software developer and works in the tech field, right? And like, believe I can intellectually keep up with that conversation.

So that’s what I mean by challenging your capability and your capacity on an intellectual level. Then there’s the tangible kind of skill-based level. So I can do this skill set, this action, or this physical thing. So this could even be like challenging your capacity to change your body composition. I could go three sizes down and change the way like overall my body looks and how tone it is and how it fits into clothes, right? Like sometimes you might want to challenge that. I have personally done that. And my physical ability to lift weights and to do certain physical activities. Challenging again your skill set for marketing, for sales, for anything, really. Any skill set you want to learn, your ability to coach.

So that’s like a tangible skill set. The way I want you to think about it is I can do this skill set, this action, or this physical thing. Then there’s production. I can work this hard. I can get this much done. I can produce more than I currently am. That’s where my three-day work week came in, or my really 15 to 20-hour work week now, and make more money.

When I was making $300K, I could not believe it was possible because I was working so much. I didn’t believe I could work any harder. In fact, I remember actually, I’ll take it even a further step back.

When I first started coaching before I became a coach, I told my one-on-one coach that I just knew it was impossible to make more money pitching and doing my demos because I couldn’t work any more hours. I was like, I physically cannot work any more hours. It’s impossible. So there’s no way to make more money because I have been making the same amount of money. Like I’m the best of the best. Like I think I’m getting out of the store what’s possible in the store.

And so we worked for an entire year on me telling myself that I am the potential inside of me. Like I am just in my energetic being with all of the atoms that make me up, I am the potential of making. So at the time, my money ceiling was $60,000. So we said I am the potential, not I have even, I am. My entire being is the potential of making $78,000 without the feeling of having worked harder like just in the time I’m already working and it’s such a crazy like very specific distinction.

But believing that my molecules make up a potential that has the ability to produce more money in the same amount or less time or without feeling like I’m working harder was mind-blowing to me. And I don’t know where $78,000 came in. That was just the number that came to my brain. It was like, if I could do that, I don’t even know why I wasn’t 80. It was 78 specifically.

What’s so crazy is at the end of that year of challenging that belief in my capacity, I made like exactly that. I started my business and got my first couple of clients. I think that was the year of 2015. Or I made something very similar, but I just remember being like, oh, holy crap, this works because the amount that I made was so similar.

And what I did is I actually did work less hours pitching and made more money. My sales actually did go up in the hours that I was working because I was coaching my brain between every show, and then I made some money coaching, which didn’t feel like work to me. So I actually did work more hours in my life and I didn’t feel like I was working more and I made more sales in the time I was working and I worked less. So I scaled my time that year.

So I think this has always been a key thing for me to challenge my production because it is the only way that I can become more and reach a greater potential and grow my business without having to work harder and work more hours, especially now that I’ve become a mom. I get that so many of you are like, I don’t want to build my business and miss my kids’ lives, and I get that. I truly do.

So if you have limited hours where you are working because you are spending time with your littles or even your bigs, they’re about to go off to college, if that is you, then the only answer to making money while doing that is increasing the skill, the thing you can tangibly do, your intellectual capacity, the decisions you make, what you learn and how you think through things, and then your production, what you get done in the hours you work. And then the fourth thing is the energetic capacity, which is, I have the energy for this.

And I think that is the biggest lie that we all tell ourselves is that we don’t have the energy for, including myself. If you asked me what is the number one thing that you have coached your brain on in the entire last 10 years that your brain has been coached, or even if you asked my one-on-one coach now who I’ve worked with for three years, what’s the thing that over the last three years that Stacey has coached the most on in her coaching sessions, I guarantee she would say this and I would for sure say this is my energetic capacity, my ability to look at my calendar and believe I can get all this work done.

And some of that is production, but the reason we tell ourselves that we can’t produce everything on our calendar is because we don’t have the energy to. This was like my biggest transformation right after I had my baby and I came back from maternity leave because my child, I love him so much. You guys know how I feel about my child and I know we all do, but sometimes people complain more than others about their kid.

But the only complaint I have about my kid is that he has not slept through the night in two years. He is not a sleeper. He struggles with naps. He struggles with nighttime sleep. He’s not a sleeper. Listen, we’ve tried everything. Don’t message me about sleep training. I love you. Don’t do it.

 We have tried all the things. He can sleep. He has the capacity and the capability to do it because he does do it. Sometimes he goes weeks on end. Like he’ll go three or four weeks in a row sleeping through the night and then we get used to it and then he stops sleeping through the night. We just had one recently, I have no idea. Like seriously, he’s not teething, he’s not sick, there’s no indicators.

But my husband and I were up with him from 11 this week. So I’m recording this on a Wednesday. This Monday, so Sunday night, he did not sleep. He went to bed at 8, slept from 8 to 11, and then was up from 11 until 5 AM. I mean, the level of exhaustion. And I had to work the next day. I think I got 90 minutes of sleep in a recliner with him sleeping on me. And then maybe another hour and a half at some point after my husband took him to the basement and put Toy Story on. Like, okay, I can do this, right?

So so much of what we tell ourselves if we look at our calendar or we look at the things we want to get done is I don’t have the energy for this. I don’t have the energy to challenge my intellectual capacity, to challenge the skill set, to produce this amount of work. I just don’t have stores of energy available to do this.

Okay, so now that you know the four things you might be challenging, here are the two reasons that we don’t achieve it. If you even try to go challenge your capacity and your capability, here are the two main reasons that I don’t think it happens. Every time I coach people on this and they’re like, I tried, this is what will happen is it’s like the difference of hustle versus hard work.

If you haven’t listened to that episode, it’s a really powerful episode. It has to do with the thoughts you’re thinking when you’re working hard. But when people tell me that they tried to challenge what they were capable of producing and all it ended is in hustle and exhaustion and burnout and then they had to take extended periods of time off and then nothing changed.

That’s typically when challenging your capacity goes wrong, is when you end up in burnout that requires lots of time off, and when you come back nothing has changed about your work ethic or your production levels or the skill levels, your intellectual levels, like nothing has actually changed. So then you’re like, oh, great. I burnt myself out and I have no value to add from it. That’s typically what happens.

If you’re successful at challenging your capability and really truly your capacity to do, again, think more, have bigger skill sets, do more, have more energy. If you’re successful what will happen is you will reach a point that feels sort of like burnout and you will be very, very, very tired and I’m gonna walk you through this, but you will be very, very tired. But when you come back from resting and refueling, you will have increased capacity. 

And you will be like, oh, holy crap, all of a sudden, in general, I get more done in my life. I’m noticing an uptick of what I’m doing as like a standard. Like my standard has changed. When I’m not in increased production mode, just my general workflow and production has increased. My decision-making has increased without getting deep coaching. My skill set has increased just on a normal general day.

So if you’re doing consults, it goes from being really, really hard and exhausting you to like, oh, I just noticed I did one and it was pretty easy and it was kind of fun. And it didn’t take hardly any energy. That’s when you know you’ve actually successfully increased your capacity.

So the reason that people don’t, I’ve thought a lot about this, like what makes people successful at this and what causes people to burn out with nothing, no value from it without actually growing and reaching a greater potential. And here are the two things.

Number 1, when it gets hard to sustain and you get really tired, you give up. You take a break, you stop, and you don’t coach your brain and like give yourself a power up in that moment long enough to break through, because it’s really painful and then we tell ourselves the thought, I can’t sustain this. This isn’t sustainable. I have to take a break. We tell ourselves, I’m exhausted. We tell ourselves our energy is depleted. We tell ourselves I can’t produce more.

We tell ourselves I’m not capable of this skill set. We tell ourselves I’m not smart enough for this. I can’t figure this out. It’s not figureoutable and in this moment when we want to give up and stop permanently, not just take like a temporary break to refuel, I mean like stop, give up, say this is no longer a goal of mine. It’s not sustainable, I can’t do this. I’m literally setting this down forever or for a long time.

In this moment, this is when I think about humans in history who have endured far greater throughout history, throughout life, throughout the earth than my hard work on my computer in my home.

I’ve read a lot of hardcore books about human resilience and the things that people go through. A couple that come to mind are A Long Way Gone, about child soldiers in Sierra Leone. These are very tough books to read, so I don’t necessarily like just recommend going out and reading them, but I Am Malala about school girls and she was shot in the head by the Taliban and survived. Stolen Girls about the school girls stolen by the Boko Haram in Africa.

I’ve read a lot of deep stories of human suffering, what humans have gone through and endured, and the resilience and the capacity and the capability they had to come out of that and to persevere. And then I think about that. And then I think about my challenge at home on my computer. And I’m like, oh yeah, this is not the same thing. And if they are capable of that, it shows me this infinite capability and capacity inside humans.

I think that’s why I’m so drawn to those stories is I’m like, ah, like the capacity of human beings. There’s another one, Uneducated. Wait, is it called Uneducated or Educated? It’s by a woman, I can’t think of her name. I think it’s a memoir called Educated, but it’s by this woman who grew up in a home environment where they weren’t allowed to learn and kind of like a cult-like environment or like a doomsday type environment where her father especially was highly abusive. I can’t remember the specifics, but she went on to go to Oxford, I think, and she just became very extraordinarily intelligent and successful. When I think of those types of stories, I live off of those types of stories.

It just is profoundly changing for me to think about those things and then look at this problem I’m trying to solve. I’m like, okay. Now, I never use that against myself. I never ever use that against myself to shame myself for having the problem or shame myself for telling myself that I don’t have the capacity. I don’t do that but I do use it for inspiration.

I do use it to think there are far bigger problems than this current, like what we call a first world problem or a champagne problem. There are far bigger issues in the world, and I do use it to help in a positive way see my problem as smalle. Again, without using it against myself. So that is one thing that I do in that moment, but I’m going to give you more things that I do, but I just want you in that moment to recognize this is one of the ways people fail at increasing their capacities is they don’t stay with it long enough to break through.

And then the second reason is because you don’t change your thoughts during the challenging of the capacity and the capability to be in flow of it while you’re doing it. So instead, it’s resistance the whole time. I can’t do this. I can’t do this. I can’t do this. I can’t do this. This is awful. This is terrible. I’ll never be able to do this. It’s too hard.

If you keep those thoughts while you’re doing it, nothing will change. You will actually just burn out and be very tired and have nothing to show for it and then believe that’s the only way to succeed. Instead, you have to coach yourself enough to keep going through. You have to find energy. You have to change I can’t to literally I can. You have to change, it isn’t possible to, it is, it’s within me.

In those moments while you’re doing it, in the day to day, and how you know you’ve done that is resistance will recede like the ocean, it will go out, and allowance and energy will come in. If energy and allowance isn’t there, it won’t be sustainable because your brain will just like keep assaulting you with, I can’t, it’s not possible, it’s terrible, I don’t have the energy for this, I’m tired. All the thoughts that wear you down.

I don’t think we actually experience physical burnout for most humans. For most people, I think we experience mental burnout. And I think the mental burnout is what creates most of the physical burnout. Now, you can get physically burnt out symptoms, but I think that starts in the mind first.

It depends on how much you believe the mind creates what’s happening in the body. I believe it creates, I will say most of it. I think there are also things that happen in the energetic world, right? Like you catch colds, you could catch COVID. You’re not catching COVID because you are a negative person, right? That’s not what I mean. But so much, way more than we understand, starts in the mind and then is created in the body. The body being the physical manifestation of a lot of what’s happening in the mind.

So here’s what has to happen. Here are some thoughts that I think will be really helpful that have been helpful for me. I have infinite capacity. I truly believe that. It’s the core of the thesis of this podcast. I believe we all have infinite capacity. Just like when I became a coach, we learned at The Life Coach School the idea that we are all just worthy, like we have infinite worthiness, we are all worthy, there is no worthy to earn, we just are.

As human beings, the moment we’re born, even before we’re born, we just have worthiness. It’s just who we are, it’s what’s inside of us. And there’s nothing required that you do in order to have it. So playing off of that, I believe we have infinite capacity. I believe as human beings, the molecules and atoms or whatever, all the science that makes us up, the energy coursing through our bodies, I believe inside there is infinite capacity.

It’s the only way it proves all of these miraculous things that people can do, what they’re capable of doing, the intelligence we’re capable of having, the skill we’re capable of achieving, the production, the amount of work we’re capable of doing, the energy we’re capable of emitting in the world. The only way that that makes sense. I don’t believe there are just certain alpha humans born and others are not. There’s certain infinite humans born. There’s not like this baby was born with 100% more potential than this baby.

Now some babies are born in different circumstances for sure, 1000%. But as a human being, you could take two babies in a hospital and put them next to each other and one was born with more capacity than another. Now, I could be proved wrong. This thought is very useful for me. So what I believe is that we have to learn to access it at greater levels and that is how we reach greater and greater levels of our own internal potential. That’s the whole game of life coaching. The whole reason to hire a coach is to access greater potential for feeling of experiencing, of doing, of thinking in this world and finding that inside of us. And we can do it without coaching. I just think coaching speeds it along.

But that is like what’s the purpose of being on the planet? I think one of them is to challenge our capacity and to innovate as humans, right? To access new levels of human innovation. So if I believe I have infinite capacity and then my job is to just learn to access it at greater levels, then that’s what I’m thinking when I’m like, oh, I don’t have the energy or I don’t have the smarts for it, I don’t have the energy for it, I don’t have the ability to work more, I don’t have the ability to do the skill set currently, but inside of me I do. And so now I have to figure out that equation. I have to figure out the components that make up that greater capacity.

Another thought I think is I am capable of increasing my capacity. I can do this. I can’t tell you how many times the thought. “I am capable of this” has changed everything for me, or I am the potential of this. The potential exists inside of my body to do this, inside of my brain to do this. The chemical makeup of who I am holds the potential for this.

When I’m challenging my intellectual capacity, I tell myself, I can do this. I can learn this. This is simple. I can simplify this. Like even if it feels complicated to learn, I can simplify it and figure it out and learn it in the most simplified way. And then once I have that, I have the ability to take it to an advanced level and then take it to a mastery level. That’s how I felt about coaching. That’s how I feel about selling.

And if you think of the way I’ve done my programs, if you come into 2K for 2K, you’re going to learn the simplest way to market and sell your business. I mean like the absolute simplest way. And then when you get good at that, if you come join us in 200K, you’re going to learn the advanced way. And then if you master that, then you’re going to come in to 2 Million Dollar Group and learn the mastery level way of marketing, selling, and delivering.

And for some people, they’re capable of just jumping right away to advanced level thinking or advanced level doing or advanced skill sets. And that’s great. Some people come into the coaching industry where they worked 100 hours a week as a doctor and so working 40 hours a week in their coaching business is not a problem. They’re like, I got this. I can do this. So we all come in from different places, but I really believe if something feels out of your capability, you find the simplest way to learn it, get good at that, then add in advanced, add in the next level, and then when you get good at that, then go into mastery, and then you have it for life.

And so an additional thought I have is, “I am capable of getting better each day.” If I just work at it every day, I will get better. This is why I think evaluating is so important. It feels like another one of those pieces that makes up me is from my pitching days all the way up until now. So for the last 16 years of my life, I have been capable of getting better at sales every single day and worked towards getting better in a very meticulous, precise way by evaluating and adjusting every day. As like just who I am, that’s just what I do. Not sometimes, every time.

Another thought I love to think is there is another version of me that is capable. What does she know? How does she handle these things? What advice would she give me? And I know that’s true because there has been a different version of me that wasn’t capable previously that is capable now. From going from making no money, from signing my first clients to making $100K, from making $100K to making a million, from making a million to making $10, from going from running a $10 million company or an eight-figure company, a little more than that, running this eight-figure company and becoming a mom.

I remember when my baby, like I could actually break him, and I was scared of him. I didn’t sleep for almost 6 days straight. It was wild, maybe longer. I just remember I was up for 32 hours giving birth, and then I was up for sure. I didn’t sleep in the hospital at all. Then we came home and the night we came home, Jackson cried the whole night. So my mom and my husband and I were all in bed with this baby trying to figure out why won’t he stop crying.

And then we were, I think, alone for maybe a day and barely slept. And then my sister came in, thank God my sister works as a nurse practitioner on the night shift. And so I remember thinking, I can’t go to sleep because I have to watch him even when he’s sleeping. And so my sister was like, “Listen, I will stay up till 4 a.m. and watch him while he’s sleeping and you go sleep.” And I feel like that was like 6 or 7 days after I actually went into the hospital to start labor. It was wild.

I laughed, but really it was not funny. It was like tragic. It was so crazy. My brain was like, I cannot do this. And now when I think about having another baby, I’m like, Neil, can you imagine? I’m going to sleep next time. I’m going to trust him and myself that he is capable and I am capable and we’re going to go to sleep.

But I really felt like he was breakable because I didn’t feel like I was capable of like caring for this fragile life. I remember that. And now I have a different version of me. So there is another version of me that is capable. What does she know? So those are the thoughts to think.

Then you have to create a strong why. When I imagine myself at big goals like $30 million, I always imagine, and this is why I actually want to go for that goal, I always imagine myself way more capable, right?

Like three times more capable than I am now. And that’s capable of a lot. Like I imagine myself having big skills, deep skill levels, like being highly skilled, being highly valuable, knowing how to solve big problems and that’s what excites me because every day, like if you think about our whole lives, the things we don’t like about our lives are just the things we’re not capable of. So I imagine all the things that I’m not capable of now that would be so easy then because I’ve developed that capability and that person knowing who I am then is very exciting for me.

Even now, the last two years, I’ve developed deep capabilities for so many things that I did not think were possible for me. That now that I have the capability, I won’t necessarily struggle with those things anymore. I’ll struggle with new things, but I won’t struggle necessarily with those things, or it’ll take way different levels of it. So I love that. I love thinking that next version of me is just going to have so much more capability than I have now and that’s gonna open a completely different life and different life experiences and different core memories will come along with that. So that’s my strong why.

I also have a really strong why and belief that increasing my capacity and my capability is the only way I can make more and be with my kids more. I have to increase what I’m capable of in skill, production, energy, and intellectually in the same amount of time that I have now. That’s the only way.

And then I always think about, it goes back to the first thing, right? Of like who I’m going to be. I love to think about what I love about the more capable version of me. So this isn’t the same philosophy as like more equals better. And I’m not talking about just like constant achievement society, because one of the other things I’ve become very good at with challenging my capacity is rest and recovery, because it does require it. You do have to rest and recover. It’s just like lifting weights.

But if you go to the gym, let’s say you go to the gym for like a week straight and you’re very tired, your body feels tired, the difference of one of the things that will keep you from increasing your capacity is saying, oh, I’m so tired, I have to take two months or three months off of working out. I have to stop working out I’m not capable of working out. Proper rest and recovery and you know revitalization, is I’m gonna work out maybe five days and take two days to rest and then I’m gonna go back to working out for five days and then I’m gonna take two days to rest. And of course, if I have a physical injury or I’m physically sick, I’ll stop, but otherwise I’m going to keep going.

And then what will happen is eventually those five days going to the trainer or going to the gym, instead of being tired all day, it will give me energy. And suddenly it will be nothing in my life to keep going. I remember there was a time where my husband and I went to the trainer for 18 months straight. And I remember thinking, oh, it’s now a lifestyle. I am a physically fit person and that’s just who I’m gonna be in my life because I kept going so rest and recovery is required but not extended amounts of it, not two and three months of it.

Okay, so if you want to increase your capability, increase your capacity, here are the seven things you have to do. So number one, you’re going to define the big thing you want to do. And I always like to say within reason, it’s like the big thing you want to do, the challenge that you want within those four things that would infinitely change your life experience to be capable of doing it, but isn’t becoming a professional football player in the NFL. That’s just what I mean, within reason. Maybe not $0 to $1 million in one year. Maybe it’s $0 to $2K, $0 to $10K, $10K to $100K, $100K to $500K, $500K to $1 million, right? So, within reason, but what’s the big thing you want to challenge your capacity on that will infinitely change your life experience to be capable of doing it.

And then the second step is to go to work to challenge it. And when you’re challenging it, coach yourself and get coached through it the entire time. Change your thoughts to be in flow in an allowance of it. You can’t just go at it and keep the same thoughts and resist it the whole time. But keep going past the point of discomfort and feeling like you don’t have the energy by a lot.

You have to start recognizing that your brain’s belief about your energy is possibly not accurate because you have infinite stores of it. But the only way you can keep it flowing is by choosing thoughts that create flow and allowance. You will run into a point where you cannot keep going if you don’t change your thoughts from resistant thoughts. But then also take defined breaks and rest periods throughout. You choose them ahead of time.

I know I’m going to go ham working. I’m going to work very, very hard, say from 11 to 4, and then I know I get to take my kid to the park. I’m going to get an extraordinary amount of things done in one week and then I’m going to go on vacation, or in one month and then I’m going to go on vacation. There will be a weekend coming up, right? Whatever it is.

So I had this period where we just reorganized my entire business or restructured and rebranded over 16 weeks. But in that time I also took two vacations, like two five-day vacations. I took the weekends off and I made sure in the morning and at night that I had things that felt restful to do. But that time was a period where I was coaching my brain like crazy, morning and night to stay in throughout the day to let go of resistance, create allowance, choose thoughts that gave me energy and purpose and to be in flow.

Then when I did take breaks, this is so important, you have to get back up and going immediately. You can’t ease in, oh, I’m easing into it, I’m building momentum. No, you got to just go right back in at the same level that you stopped at. So on Monday morning, it’s back at it. And then you go until you break through. And how you know you break through is you’re working at a higher level, achieving at a higher level, you have a higher level skill set, you have more energy than you’ve ever had before. Suddenly you’re gaining energy, you feel it and you now know there’s just a sense that you feel in your body that you now have increased your standard capacity.

I had a 16 week period of challenging my capacity and my capability. After the 200K launch, I took a couple of weeks of where we intentionally down-regulated my body and my nervous system. I’ve never challenged my capacity for that long. So we had two weeks where I was very clear on the time I was working and what I was doing, but I was giving myself lots of rest. And then I went on a three-day vacation that was amazing with lots of rest.

And when I came back after that rest, I noticed, oh, I’m just getting a lot more done than I’ve ever gotten done without feeling like I’m challenging my capacity again. It just is challenge. It’s just at a different level. So go until you accomplish it.

And here’s what you need to know while you’re doing this. Your brain will tell you all the reasons you can’t do it and should quit the entire time. You will question your why like crazy. You’ll want to quit really bad. You’ll feel very tired. You will want to take temporary breaks from time to time, and that’s okay. But you will have to push through when you think you can’t do anymore. That’s the whole point.

You will have to entertain your internal and external resourcefulness a lot more than your reasons why you can’t. And all of that will be deeply uncomfortable. And all of that you will feel like you don’t have the energy for. And you’ll have to tell yourself you do. You’ll have to remind yourself of your infinite capacity and capability, your infinite energy that resides inside of you.

And the end result is you’ll come out the other side more capable with new skill sets, new thoughts, new levels of production. I’ve gone from seven hours to create a podcast to two hours to being able to do one in 25 minutes. I’ve gone from needing 90 minutes for a call to get someone to a resolution to 10 to 20 minutes to give profound coaching. Right, there was a time where I went from, I don’t know how to get a client, and I don’t know anyone who wants coaching, to signing 16 back to back while working a full-time job. I’ve gone from $300K a year, working 40 hours a week, to $10 million a year, $12 million a year, working three days a week.

This year I went from having two multiple six-figure employees who were experts at their job to me learning their job and doing their job on top of mine. And this is the process every single time. So I want to finish this episode with an email I wrote to all of you that are on my list. And if you’re not on my list, we’ll link up how to get on my list in the show notes.

But here’s what I wrote. Overwhelmed only happens when we don’t feel capable, when we don’t believe we have the capacity. The emotion we have when thinking I can’t overwhelms us. This is what causes the overwhelm. This is not the moment to slow down, back up, change the course, lighten the load. This is the moment to decide I can. What if I really can? What if you really can? It’s the moment to decide you are capable, you will be capable, to find your capability, your capacity. It’s all already inside of us. We just have to access it. We have to step into the belief that we are capable and access the emotion through execution and bam, we are capable.

I recently took over all operations and management of my business. My brain wanted to tell me that I was not capable, but I am the director. I tell it what to do and what to think. I told myself I am capable of figuring this out. I want to figure this out. I can do this. Then I decided it’s going to be simple. This is how I will do it. My brain wanted to offer me thoughts about how hard it will be, how I couldn’t handle it, how I didn’t understand the scope. I kept directing it back to, “this is simple.”

So I spent the first two weeks as head of operations understanding every task in my company. Then I started simplifying them. I met with every contractor, every employee. I told myself, I can do this. This will be fun. It’s a chance to connect.

I learned everything about what they do. I scheduled recurring meetings with them. I brought on two new people to help with workload. I decided to be clear on what work I needed done. I started with planning our two biggest launches of the year. We simplified things even further. We went through every step and every detail. We made lots of decisions.

My brain was tired. It wanted to stop. It offered me overwhelm. I offered it capability. When we finished planning, I looked at every task I was responsible for. My brain offered me overwhelm again. I offered it back capability. I am capable. I got to work. It continues to offer me overwhelm. I continue to offer it capability. I get the work done.

Every time I do this, I increase my capacity. I increase my capability. Actually, what I do is increase my ability to tap into my capability. You see, it’s inherent. We all have infinite amounts. We just aren’t practiced at tapping in. We are practiced at letting our brain tell us we are overwhelmed and then agreeing. We have reinforced this our whole lives, but it’s there waiting inside you, waiting to come out to do your dreams. The big thing you have always wanted. It’s there. Find it. Not once every day. Keep coming back until it’s your habit.

Hey, if you’re ready to make money as a life coach, I want to invite you to join my 2K for 2K program; where you’re going to make your first $2,000 the hardest part using my simple five-step formula for getting consults and closing new clients. Just head over to StaceyBoehman.com/2Kfor2K. We’ll see you inside.