Ep #292: Creating Emotional Safety with Money

Welcome to the Make Money as a Life Coach® podcast where sales expert and master coach Stacey Boehman teaches you how to make your first 2K, 20K, and 200K using her proven formula.

Hey, coaches, today I have a really special episode for you. I shared recently on my Instagram stories, a series of affirmations that I did. And I don’t do a ton of affirmations, so these feel more like to me, embodiments, where I remind myself of truth, that I do believe while feeling very deeply into my body. And often holding my body in some way, whether it’s hand to heart or both hands to heart, hand to stomach, hands on my legs with my feet on the ground.

It’s some form of connection to my whole body, and then reminding myself and walking myself through getting into my body and experiencing safety. And I did this recently when I had made a really big investment in my business. And the moment I made it, I felt so much hope and also so much fear. And that doesn’t always go away when you are experienced in investing. It’s a very vulnerable thing to meet a problem head on, face to face, and be willing to put time and money into it, and to be willing to go on the journey to saying, “I’m solving this forever for me.”

It’s a very intimate experience to invest in yourself. And this one really filled my eyes with tears and made me quite emotional in a lot of ways. And I needed to just take a moment for myself and recalibrate and ground. And I shared the process that I did on my stories. They are saved there. If you want to see the live version, you can see it in my highlights. It’s under creating safety @staceyboehman on Instagram but I wanted to walk you through that today.

I had so many requests to share this on the podcast so that you could listen to this over and over and over and have this in your ears and really be with this embodiment yourself. I invite you to change the words to whatever feels true for you and impactful to you, whatever thought you can say, that you can feel radiating through your body. This, to me, is the difference of an embodiment series versus affirmations that maybe you don’t believe and when you see them there is no connection to your inner body, your inner world, your emotional world. There has to be a connection.

The words you say, the touch to your body and then the feeling that goes all the way through your body, this is the only way it works. So, I invite you to find your truth, your set of statements that you can say to yourself in a time where you may need to create emotional safety in your body, specifically when it comes to money, but you can also do this with visibility. You can do this with holding space for your clients.

Anything that really has the opportunity to unground you and dysregulate you, deregulate you, you can come back to yourself anytime by doing a similar series that I’m about to walk you through. And then I’ll talk to you a little bit about this series and how it can apply to your business and why it’s so important after I walk you through it. Are you ready? Let’s go.

Hand to your heart, if you would like, both hands to your heart to where you can feel your heart beating in your chest. That you can feel the breath going in and out of your body and you feel the physical experience of being you in this moment. Deep breathe in, deep breathe out. I am safe in this body. This body was created to keep me safe. I am safe in this body while I work towards my goals. I am safe in this body when I fail. I am safe in my body when someone tells me no. I am safe in my body when people misunderstand me.

I am safe in this body if the money I want to come hasn’t come in yet. I am safe in my body if I just made a big investment. I am safe in my body for this money to leave my bank account, to leave me and to go towards my greatest desires. I am safe in my body if those desires have not been created yet. I am safe in my body if I haven’t yet created my dreams. I am safe in my body to do this work. My body was created to keep me safe.

This body that I am in, holds big emotions and sometimes I feel them and it also holds big dreams. And I can achieve them because also this body holds the potential to achieve them. I am so grateful for this body that holds all of this possibility for me. I love this body. I love this money that has gone out towards my dreams. I love my effort. I love me. I am safe. I am so grateful for this money, for this body, for these emotions, for me.

I repeat this series over and over and I add things in as they come up for me, the more connected I am to myself, to my breath, to my heart beating, to my body, to my emotions, the more connected I am the more sentences come to me, the more safety I generate, the new emotions I generate. I generate an experience of feeling held by myself, which is a profound experience.

A personal hug, a personal holding of me, a personal holding of my dreams, of all of the fears and all of the things that feel on the line, and also an expansion of what can be, what I desire to be and what I’m working to have. This is such important work, getting into your body. When we feel these big emotions and we have big dreams on the line and big money on the line, we have to be with our body, be with our emotions even if it is a big emotion, a hard emotion.

When you can be with your body in any emotion and when you believe your body is here on your side to protect you, that you are safe in this body, no matter what vibration is happening inside of it right now. No matter what is external happening around you, when you can believe and feel deeply into being safe in your body.

When you can believe that you have everything you need right now, right inside of you and tap into that, feeling it deep into your entire body, through your bones. From your toes, all the way up to your head, radiating through you, when you can do this practice, you will do more, you will hold back less. You will have more energy because you will be in flow with yourself, in acceptance of yourself and every single part of the journey and every single experience you have in that journey.

Instead of resistance to yourself and resistance to what’s happening inside of you, resistance to your body, resistance to your emotions. Because I do this process very intimately and quietly and personally with myself, when I think of my students, when I think of my past and building my business, I can be with a client on a consult. I can be in the conversation of money and I can hold their fears of making an investment. I can hold their fears of maybe not getting the result they want.

I can hold the potential and the deep desire to achieve what they want and make their dreams come true. I can hold space for them because I hold space for myself in that moment. Because I have been there in my body and I have created the ability to feel all of these things in my body and to tolerate all of these things in my body, to listen to all of these things in my body.

And because I have created safety, when lack of safety comes up for me, when my body is activated, when that emotion is actively happening, I have been able to find safety with myself and my body, and find sufficiency. And that I’m able to tell myself, I am okay and because of that I can feel that okay-ness I can bring up that okay-ness in any given moment, no matter what’s happening externally outside of me. Then I can show up to a coaching call or a consult and I can hold that space for someone else.

I can hold space for big fears, big emotions and clients when making money decisions, when making power moves, when showing up for themselves and their business for their clients. Because I have found the safety and sufficiency first in me. That is the magic. That is the real work of a life coach. If you want to make money and serve people and help people profoundly, this is the real work. This is also where the work begins for you, if you want to do big things in your business and go to the next level.

If you want to be able to overcome any amounts of failure, if you want to save a launch. If you want to create a new consult when a no show happens. If you want to create a best client when a least ideal client shows up on a consult. When you want to be able to immediately recover, if you want to make it through the hardest parts in your life and in your business, the best thing that you can ever do is create a very intimate relationship with your body.

An intimate relationship that is made up of embracing all of the things your body produces, not just the good things, creating, safety and feeling at home in your body with all of the emotions. Being able to honor everything your body tells you. Being able to feel all of the emotions that come up for you and not run away. But use them as an opportunity to have a deep, honest, intimate relationship with yourself and your body and all of your emotions, again, not just the good feeling ones.

To be able to create a belief inside of you that when a big emotion comes up, it won’t overtake you, that you are capable of bringing yourself back down. You are capable of regulating yourself so you never have to worry about letting a big emotion out and then it running away and never finding your way back because you bring yourself back. You can feel anything, so you can hold space for anything and anyone.

This level of rootedness, grounded-ness, is transformational and profound for yourself and for everyone that is in your presence. They feel that you do this for yourself, so they know that you can do this for them without you even having to tell them. But when you do explain it to them, you will do it so very well, they will know it’s true that you have deep emotional wells and deep emotional tools to also hold them and theirs.

That you can walk them through anything and see them to the other side, that there will never be an emotion or an experience that happens and gets away from them, that they aren’t also able to bring back because you will help them re-regulate. You will help them come back to themselves. You will help them find safety and sufficiency back in their body. But there is nothing too big they will bring to you because you’ve got you, you’ve got them.

Okay, coaches, have this and listen to this as often as you need. Do this exercise regularly and change it to be whatever it is you most need. Hands to heart, deep breathe in, deep breathe out as many times as you need, feet on the floor until you can experience your breath, your heartbeat, the feeling in your fingers, the feeling in your toes. You’ve got you. You’ve got them. Have a beautiful week. I love you all so much. Talk to you next week.

Hey, if you’re ready to make money as a life coach, I want to invite you to join my 2k for 2k program where you’re going to make your first $2,000 the hardest part using my simple 5 step formula for getting consults and closing new clients. Just head over to www.staceyboehman.com/2kfor2k. We’ll see you inside.