Make Money as a Life Coach® with Stacey Boehman | Giving Yourself Too Much Time

How long are you giving yourself to achieve the goals you’ve set?

One common thread among the thousands of coaches I’ve worked with is that many of you are giving yourselves way too much time for your goals. Whether you’re working toward your first 2K, 25K, or 200K, your timeframe is probably longer than it needs to be, and it’s time to collapse it. You might think giving yourself more time makes the process easier, but in reality, you’re inadvertently entertaining failure and making it much harder on yourself.

Join me on this episode to learn why giving yourself too much time to achieve your goal presents problems, and how my success has come from not being willing to give myself time to get something done. I’m showing you the power of collapsing timelines, and one high-value question you can ask yourself that will put you in a get-it-done-today mentality.

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What You’ll Learn from this Episode:

  • Examples from my career where I’ve decided to do something in a short timeline.
  • Why giving yourself too much time to achieve your goals becomes a problem.
  • The highest-value question you can ask yourself.
  • How delaying your goals makes them significantly harder to achieve.
  • The power of collapsing timelines.
  • What happens when you decide to give yourself less time in the pursuit of your goals.

 

Listen to the Full Episode:

 

Featured on the Show:

 

Full Episode Transcript:

 

 

Welcome to the Make Money as a Life Coach® podcast where sales expert and master coach Stacey Boehman teaches you how to make your first 2K, 20K, and 200K using her proven formula.

Hi, coaches, welcome to episode 283. Today I’m so excited to chat with you. First of all, we just finished our first 200K Mastermind Unbundled launch. And I know I say this every round, but I really believe it and it feels very true this round that we have the absolute best class coming in. I am so excited. I was thinking about why it gets better and better every round and I really think that that’s the result of my client communications, what I teach in the room, PSPR selling, the way that I market the things that I say that bring people in.

I’m just always calling in the next best version of the room and I’m always calling my next best version of me. And specifically in this round when I was marketing it, I was in the middle of recording new modules for the program that are the best. So, so excited. I’ve been telling my students, we gave the current class as well, access to the new modules because we just got them done so fast, we wanted to have all our students have access to them right away when they signed up. And so, we also gave them to our current class.

And I was telling them there’s two in advanced selling that are just so, so good. Where I really break down the difference of selling when you’re on a webinar or in copy or in challenge weeks, selling and teaching the what someone needs to do and the why. And seeding and giving beliefs for them to be able to take action while staying out of the how and then what’s the difference. And then when you actually go to teach someone how to break down teaching the how.

And I think it’s really a key, key element in taking someone’s sales on a webinar or through copy or through consults even from maybe a 20 or 30 or 40% conversion to much, much higher. Because of the state of what happens to a client, what happens in their brain and their body when they’re receiving the selling. So, I’m just really, really, really excited. It was a little bit of a tangent, but I’m just very excited for this new class. They’re really amazing.

I was really blown away by the videos that came in and the people that applied and the things you all shared with me. And it’s so exciting to usher in a new class and we’re really, really pumped for all of you. So, if you are joining us for this next round, welcome. We’re so, so excited.

And if we had to turn you away, this is always the hardest part for me, is telling people no, and typically this point in where we are, we only tell people no, there has to be a glaring issue or most often it’s just you’re not at the revenue requirement that we require and we take that pretty seriously.

And so, I was thinking this week, planning for this episode of all of the students who wanted to be in the room who just weren’t quite there at the income requirements. Not just if you applied and we couldn’t accept you because you weren’t there but so many of you reached out and said, “I really, really, really want to be in the room. And I’m working on the income requirements or I’m working on the investment.”

And then of that group of people, of all of the people who in some way, shape or form commented, talked to me, sent me a message, sent us an email, told us on calls, whatever it was. I just feel like I’ve been deep in conversation with people in the last few weeks. Of those people, and this happens every round, this is not this round is the exception. Every time I sell 200K for the last many rounds, many rounds, I always say, “Share with me if you are wanting to join, are you joining this round? Are you joining next round? Are you joining sometime in the future?”

Especially if you’re in 2K because I really like to look out for those people and know, they have a big goal, they’re trying to get in that room. And I really want to make sure I’ve just got my eyes on them and think about them and give them support and encouragement as well. Because I think it’s a big deal to say, “I’ve just started my coaching business, but I can see myself one day making 200K.” I recognize the underdog in not being ready yet, but wanting to be ready. This is just very close to my heart.

So, I really do think of you all so much when we’re in enrollment and when we’re not in enrollment. And so, I was thinking what could I share with you today that would be really, really valuable. And even if this is, you’re never planning on joining 200K, I mean I don’t know why you wouldn’t. But just in general, I was thinking this will really be helpful to so many people. And so, what we’re going to talk about today is giving yourself too much time for your goals. Now, I’m going to tread lightly on this because I know that some of you also operate in a different bucket.

And so, I’m going to explain the all or nothing versions of this and then what I’m going to address today. So, I like to think of all the things I coach on, all the thoughts I coach on, all the concepts I teach, the different all or nothing versions of those things. So, the all or nothing version of time when it comes to your business is not giving yourself enough time. And really pressuring yourself constantly to a point where you can’t even take action because you want something giant and you want it right now and you’re not willing to be patient or do the work, the nitty gritty everyday work of actually getting it done.

So, this might look like, I want to make a 100K and it needs to be tomorrow or nothing’s good enough. And I do see this a lot with people who are making a lot of money in their corporate jobs or their careers where they have really high paying jobs. And so, they just tell themselves, no money until it replaces their income is good enough and it has to happen really quickly so they can leave their job. And it just creates that end of the spectrum, the all or nothing spectrum creates a lot of pain and a lot of frustration and a lot of not achieving your goals.

But that’s not actually the one I’m going to talk about today. I can talk about that at a different time. The one that I want to talk about is on the other end of the spectrum where people will tell me, “I’m going to be in that room one day, I plan on joining.” And they’ll tell me years in advance, “I’m going to be there in 2026. It’s on my three-year plan. I plan to be there.” They’ll tell me in the next 18 months. “So, I’m going to join the July 2025 class.” They’ll give me these extraordinary amounts of time.

And I talked and taught a lot about this in my 25K group. This is one of the main issues that keeps coaches specifically from 2K to 25K hitting that revenue requirement. What happens is we just give ourselves way too much time to close that gap. And the same is true from going from nothing to 2K. We also give ourselves way too much time for that. Historically, when I look at, yes, there are the people who do the opposite where they don’t give themselves enough time. They’re not willing to give it even six months and they’re like, “It has to be tomorrow or I quit.”

So again, we’re not talking in this episode to those people. I can do one for you, I promise. But historically, what I’ve seen coaching thousands of coaches, truly is too many of you all are giving yourselves too much time to get it done. So, I really want to talk to the people that are at the zero going to 2K and then at 2K going to 25K or any amount in between or even if it’s a little bit over or if it’s to come up with the 10K. Whatever it is, you’re giving yourself too much time typically.

So, before I dive in, I want to say this one quick thing and this one quick story, because I have experience in this. So, when I started my business, I don’t remember when I think back necessarily what my timeframes were to get my first client. I do know that I expected it to come immediately after I was certified and I was very shocked that it didn’t. But I did sign one within a couple of months of taking my coach certification and just deciding I’m opening my business, which is really that was the point for me is just deciding I’m opening my business.

And I remember that first 20 to 25K took me almost six months. I started in July and by that December I had made 18K. And then I also remember the beginning of that next year was really slow. And I had made 18K but there was a very big lull before I got another group of clients. It felt like a long time. Maybe my last client was in October and then it was April until I signed the next client. It was something ridiculously long, especially in my world.

And I just remember thinking sometime that April ish somewhere around that time, it’s taken me roughly six or eight months to get to 25K. So maybe that was in my trailing 12 months. And I remember telling myself, okay, so six months from now, I’ll have made another 25K. And then I remember thinking, wait a minute, having that little voice inside of you, that kind of questions your thinking and I remember catching it.

And I said, “Wait a minute, why does it have to take you the amount of time it took you the first time? Can’t that happen faster? What would be required to make it be faster?” And that was kind of a seedling of realizing that you could do something faster or that you were in control of the timeline. Within eight weeks I signed 16 clients back-to-back. So, I really do understand what you all might be going through.

There have been other times where I have really questioned timelines and challenged myself. I remember I wanted to do a VIP day with my coach at the time. And it was $15,000 or something crazy, a lot of money and I didn’t have any of that money. And I needed to do it quickly because the one thing was, I think I had a client who wanted to do a one with me, but I’d never done it and I had no clue what to even do. She just asked.

She was like, “Hey, do you have something where we could spend a couple of days just you and I, and totally immerse in coaching and it’s just, I just have you to myself for a couple of days.” And so of course I was like, “Yes, of course.” And I made up a price for what I would be willing to do for that. And then I thought, well, what am I going to do? I’ve never done one. And so, I asked my coach, “Have you done these?” And she was like, “Yes.” And so, I’m like, “Okay, well can I do one with you before I do one with my client?”

But what I had charged my client was not near enough of what my coach was going to charge me and so I had to come up with the money. And I remember needing to come up with roughly $13,000 in a very small amount of time and I did it. I figured out how to do it. I just decided, I’m doing it. I’m doing it. I’m making this money. And I think it was within 72 hours. I said yes and I committed to paying my coach. And then within 72 hours I created that money in my business.

So, I could tell you so many different stories throughout my career where I’ve done this. But I just know that it’s been a big part of my success is being willing to not give myself very much time to get something done. So, I want to give you some just suggestions. These are not concrete. These are not set in stone. These are not, it has to be this way or it’s wrong. But I do want to give you some openings in your mind of things to think about.

So, if you’re going to make your first 2K, give yourself 30 days or less. So many of you are giving yourselves a year. No, give yourself 30 days. And even within that, this is something you’ll learn in 2K is, give yourself just the day. I’m going to make 2K today. And then at the end of 30 days make sure you failed hard 30 different times, you have failed at making 2K today 30 times, that you’ve taken it that seriously. If you’re going to give yourself 30 days, you really only want to give yourself one day because it might take you 30 attempts to figure out how to do 2K in one day.

But you want to give yourself a small amount of time. I mean, there’s so many people that come into 2K and they make it back the same day or within a week or within two weeks. And I’m always thinking about those students, what are they thinking? What are they believing about themselves? Is it just that they don’t give themselves too much time? They just tell themselves we’re doing it, we’re doing right now. So, give yourself one day, no more than 30 days of truly trying.

And I am going to talk about what that looks like, what is going to be required for you to do that. But if you want to get from 2K to 25K, give yourself 6 to 12 months. If it’s your first 25K, be willing to give yourself 12 full months but even then I would be trying to do it. I would have that timeline. I’d be like, “Okay, I’m willing to give myself 12 months, but I’m doing it in six.” I would just take it seriously. No more, though, than 12 months, no more.

And the reason I know it’s so possible to do 25K in the first 12 months of your business is how many people apply for 200K and they’ve met that minimum and they’re coming in each round at that. I don’t know how many exactly, but I bet it’s at least 100 people that have come in through our doors having made 25K, and that’s just the people that apply. That’s not the people who have made that and then not applied or the people who did it much faster.

But I just know I see that in the applications for the last 11 rounds over and over and over I’m seeing people do that so I know it’s possible. And I see so many people do it in even less. And then if you’ve done that marker, if you’ve made it into 25K in 12 months, do it in six. And then if you’ve done it in six, do it in 30 days. We have an entire program in 200K Mastermind, a bonus challenge called the 25K in 30 day challenge. We take it seriously. I really break down how to do that, how to make 25K in just 30 days because if you can keep collapsing your timeline.

One student posted, I can’t remember who it was, but recently and said, “I did it in a day. I remember thinking 25K in 30 days was impossible and I just did it in a day.” I really want to encourage you all, no matter how much money you’ve made, you give yourself three years or less to make 200K. Don’t give yourself six years or five years. And notice if you say one day, just notice that one day you’ve given yourself infinite time. If you say one day, you’ve given yourself infinite time.

I’m going to hit 25K one day. I’m going to make 200K one day. I’m going to make 100K, doesn’t matter what the amount is. I’m going to make this amount of money one day. I’ll be there one day. One day will never come. Your people are saying this too, by the way. If you can solve this for you, this is a little bit of a rant but if you can solve it for you, you could solve it for your clients. The reason they’re not reaching out for consults is because they’re telling themselves one day.

The art of coaching, I truly believe the art of coaching is going from the one day mentality to today mentality. If everyone’s like, “What’s coaching?” If you want to give them my explanation, feel free. It’s getting out of one day mentality and going to today mentality. And I’ve told these stories on the podcast a lot but I’m the person in all of my people’s lives where they’ll give me one day mentality and I just get it done. I figure out how to get it done and people love that. I’m like, “Oh no, no, let’s just do it now.”

A great example of this is my mother-in-law kept saying how much she would love to have all of her old VHS tapes of her three boys, all their baseball games and all of those things on video, a current video. So that you could watch it on a computer or DVD or something remote to current technology. And she talked about it for so long that one day I was like, “Well, what do we need to do to make that happen?” And there is a company that does it. You collect the videos, you pay some money, you send them in, you get them back. And I just got done for her. She was so blown away.

But that’s just how I think now. I think in today mentality, not one day. We’ve got to get it done now. How do we get it done now? That question is the highest value question you can ask yourself for everything. How can we just get it done now? And listen, I’m not perfect at this by all means. I don’t think it’s possible for humans for us to be perfect at this and everything. But we have had this garage project forever on our minds. And then first it was focusing on the business, then it was focusing on our wedding, then it was focusing on the baby and then not having help.

And this project kept getting bigger and bigger and bigger in our minds. And it was just off to the side of our garage. We had a segment of things that since we moved in, we had never organized or gone through and decided what we were keeping and what we were throwing away. And it nagged at us every day. And one day on my baby’s nap, I told my husband, “Let’s just start. Let’s give ourselves 15 minutes and see how much we can get done.” 15 minutes. Every time we talked about this project, we were like, “It’s going to take a whole weekend.”

We got 75% of the project done in 15 minutes. My coach has said this so many times to everyone, “We will take as much time as we give ourselves.” We gave ourselves 15 minutes and got so much of it done. The rest is literally waiting on, we need to go buy some bins and we need to do some other things and we didn’t have time, we had other things scheduled that day. But in 15 minutes we just got 75% of it done. We take as much time as we give ourselves.

I would just use this measurement, whatever time you’ve given yourself, consider if I slash that in half, what would it take? And once you really start to wrap your mind around cutting that in half, then maybe see if you could do more. Be like, “Okay, if I cut it in half again, what would that look like?” Just challenge yourself to think about it if you’re someone who is giving yourself lots of time. Now, before I dive into a couple of things that might be helpful, this is really interesting.

I had a student, Claire Moss in 2K for 2K post and give some really amazing advice to our students. And I’m going to be kind of paraphrasing some of the things that she said, but it felt really important to talk about it on this podcast. So, she had posted and she had questioned the difference between when you bought 2K for 2K or any program versus when you start. And she was saying, “Get really clear and honest with yourself about that difference.”

And so, for her, she had bought the program and then maybe two years went by before she actually started. And she talked about the story of telling herself, no, no, the start date, that’s the date, that’s my beginning. And then I count how much money I’ve made in what amount of time from that date. And I thought this was so brilliant because I’ve coached so many people in 2K for 2K, they’ll join and then they’ll get on the call and they’ll tell me, “I’ve been in business for six years and I haven’t made any money.” And I’m like, “That’s impossible. It’s impossible.”

And so, then I start kind of picking at it and I might say, “Okay, in that time period, have you been working your business part-time, full-time? How many offers have you made? Do you consider that entire time all in?” And typically, once we start kind of asking questions they’re like, “Well, I just started making offers last month.” And they’ve been thinking about their business for six months or they’ve been posting content for six years but not actually calling people to action.

Or they’ve been making offers, but not serious ones, not all in, in their brain, their body, not fully committed. Whatever it is, just for this purpose of giving yourself too much time because some of you might be like, “Oh my God, I’m that person. I’ve been in business six years.” You use it to mean it means it’s not going to happen for me, it’s not going to work for me. So, what’s really helpful is when you get a better frame of reference for your starting point and then from that moment.

So, I would let today even, it doesn’t matter what’s happened in the past, I would let today be your starting point. But something to look at is the difference between when you invested in yourself versus when you actually started. The difference of when you started your business versus when you started making consistent offers and stopped having any excuses and just going all in. The difference from when you even started by yourself versus when you got help. There’s a big difference there too.

And it could just be no matter what in the past, today is your starting point. So, whatever it is, just get a better frame of reference, a more useful, a more aware, a more factual frame of reference for your starting point. And even if it’s been a year and you’ve made no money, that’s okay, let’s just start today. Say, “Today is the new starting point.” And then we want to go to work to get it done.

And here are some things I want you to think about to go get it done. The first thing is, you need to be really clear and experiment with this, prove to yourself how this is true, that it gets harder the longer you give yourself, especially in the moments where you want to decide to give yourself more time because you failed or because work is hard and it gets really, really painful. It gets harder the longer you give yourself. The longer you give yourself, the harder you make it.

Here’s what happens, it’s like a thought error in our brain. I think that we give ourselves too much time or more time because we think that if we give ourselves more time, it will be easier. And we just don’t realize that the delaying actually is what makes it significantly harder. I want you to think about how that’s true. I don’t even want to tell you how it’s true. I want you to take a second and think about how it’s true.

Another one I want to give you is that it’s actually harder to not take action than to take action. It’s another thought error that our brain tells us, it’s so hard to take action. No, it’s so hard not to take action. I’ll give you a little bit of this, but I want you to also test this and think about why that could be true.

A couple of my explanations for why this is true is at least when you’re failing, you’re doing something about your dreams. And you get a feeling that comes with trying really hard and going all in, knowing you’re giving it your all. At the end of the day, you knew you used all of yourself up towards your dream, even though, and even if your current all, the all that you give it, isn’t quite good enough to achieve yet what you want to achieve. It still feels way better than doing nothing or than trying just a little.

Doing nothing at least comes with the bliss of avoidance, you can just shove it down and distract yourself and relax. It’s still harder and more uncomfortable, I think, than going for it really. But the hardest one is almost that in between where you’re trying just a little bit and then your brain tells you you’re giving it your all, but you’re not.

I never, by the way, let myself tell myself that. I never let me tell myself I tried everything and it didn’t work, never. It’s such an un-useful statement because then it just means it doesn’t work, it’s not possible for me. Versus I’ve tried everything that I knew to try so far, and now I’ve got to come up with new things to try. I’ve got to keep going. Or what does it look like to actually try harder? Is there another version of it that’s available? I promise you there always is. It’s a capacity thing.

We always have more capacity than what we realize, it’s infinite inside of us and our brain tells us it’s not there because it wants us to sit on the couch and eat cookies and not do anything scary or uncomfortable and risk anything. I also love the saying, a body in motion stays in motion and a body at rest stays at rest. It’s so true. We know this physically so many of us.

If any of us have a running regimen or we get to the gym or we start working with a trainer and we stay in that consistently. It’s super easy to keep going with it. It’s so hard to get back up after you’ve gotten down. It’s so hard. I believe that in business too. If we could just stay in the momentum, we have to create the momentum first and then if we can stay in it, it’s so much easier than not. So just consider, what if it’s actually true that it’s harder for me to not take action, that it’s harder for me to give myself more time. It’s more painful for me to give myself more time than not.

And then I really want you to make each day its own separate attempt. In 25K group we call this collapsing timelines. One of the things I found when I got students in the door is that they were giving themselves so much time to make 25K, so much time again, to get into two 200K or to have the money for the investment. And we worked on who they would have to become again, to do it in half the time or a quarter of the time.

And I love the idea of collapsing timelines because there’s something about that concept that gives us energy, that makes us excited, that feels like a worthy challenge, a worthy grind. I’m going to collapse timelines in my life. This is why I feel like I’ve lived so many lifetimes in one life is because I’m constantly just collapsing time and getting so much more in a year than I ever would have in my whole lifetime. There are literally years that I’ve lived on this planet where I’ve done more, experienced more, engaged more in my life than all of my previous years prior, it felt like it anyways.

And the achievements prove that. That’s how if you make $1 million you make sometimes more than someone will make in an entire lifetime. It requires your brain to do that, to collapse timelines. And one of the ways that I had them do this is by changing the perception of the money gap in their mind by thinking of themselves further along with more confidence. So, I had them add a zero to what they’d already made. Now, if you’re at zero, I would say just what would be different if you were already at 10K? Or if you’re at 2K, what would be different if you were already at 20K?

If you’re at 10K, what would be different if you were already at 100K trying to get to 200K? I ask them to think about what would change by seeing themselves more confidently, with more money under their belt. And then what they perceive as maybe a smaller gap so just as an exercise to try it on.

One of the other questions I ask them is, what they would think about me if I were at 10 million, failing to get to 20 million. Because so many of them are at 10K trying to get to 200K and failing and they’re telling themselves these horrible stories about themselves and taking it very personally. And every time I ask them, “Well, what do you think about me failing at 10 million to get to 20?” And they’re like, “Well, I mean, you’ve already done so much.” And they’ll just give so many excuses and what they think about me is so confident and so good and so valuable.

And then the way that they talk to themselves is just completely different. Well, it’s because you’re not good enough. And it’s because you aren’t as a good coach. It’s because people don’t like you. It’s because of all these personal things. It’s so interesting what they would tell themselves about my failure versus what they tell themselves about their own failure. So that’s something else that you can look at. Because what happens when you collapse timelines is you do start risking so much more.

When you decide to give yourself less time, you risk more, you take more action, you fail more. So, what you tell yourself in that failure, matters. We talk about belief plans on this podcast. You’ve got to have a self-talk plan through failure. You’ve got to decide what you’re going to say to yourself about it. And the better your thoughts are, the better things you say to yourself, the more you learn from that failure. That failure, know that this is such a simple personal development, concept or idea but it is profound.

The things you learn in the failure from the failure are the things, they’re the roadmap to where you want to go. And you can’t get that roadmap if you don’t fail. If you don’t risk, if you don’t put things on the line and you want to do all of that quickly, not in a hurried hustly way from, I’m not good enough. And I have to do it now, otherwise I can’t believe that I’ll ever do it from, no, I’m serious about this. We’ve got to do this now.

And then when you’re in that, you’ve got to have a plan for how you’re going to treat yourself. You’ve got to know ahead of time you’re going to treat yourself well. You have a plan for recovery and for getting back out there again. I was thinking about, because I think this episode, the value is just challenging the thought, challenging how much time you’re giving yourself. But I was thinking about what do I think are all the things that someone needs to do to collapse the timeline and stop giving themselves too much time.

So, the first is collapsing the timeline, deciding to give yourself less time. And then after you’ve decided to give yourself less time, committing to really taking action, higher levels than you’ve ever done before. Being willing to risk bigger things than you’ve ever risked, what would be required to get it done right now? Literally, you’ve heard that saying rip the band-aid off. This is really actually a gross story, but a really great story to exemplify why it’s actually harder and more painful to take it slow.

So, when I was pitching one time in a Kroger in Louisville, Kentucky, I was selling a slicer. And this changed after this moment company wide, but in the beginning, when we sold these slicers for years, they wanted it to be a show and really impressive and look easy and safe. And the way that they thought they would teach us to do that is to start the show immediately. As soon as we pulled out the machine, take a giant russet potato and run it through the biggest blades and make French fries without the safety handle.

And we would do just half the potato but they thought that would make it look safe, easy and impressive. What actually happened is I cut part of my thumb off. I had been doing it for years. I think the store had been so dead and their sound system hadn’t been working. And so, it was supposed to be this really good store and I was going to make all this money and having big crowds was always so fun. And no one was coming for days and days. And I finally figured out how to get people there and I had my biggest crowd ever and they were all so excited.

And I just got ahead of myself and I took just the slightest rotation off of what it was supposed to be and got my thumb. It was horrible. I had to go to the emergency room. I was right in front of an urgent care and they were like, “Yeah, you’ve got to go to the emergency room, this is a lot of blood.” I cut an actual part of my thumb off, there wasn’t even stitches to be made, it was just gone. So, then they treated it. And they said, “You need to change the gauze or whatever after three or so days.”

Well, I had gone up to my sister and she’s a nurse, I’d gone up to her house to visit right after. By the way, I had to go back in the next day and sell those damn things with my hand bandaged all the way up and I still sold us out, which I still think is so amazing. But I go up to my sister’s and it’s time to take it off but the gauze had started growing onto my skin. So, when we would go to take it off, it was having to rip my skin back off. It was so painful, I cannot even describe it to you. It was so painful. And I’m kind of a wuss anyways, especially with stuff like that.

And so, my sister was like, “Well, let’s go to my good friend, Julie’s house. And she’s also a nurse practitioner.” And she’s like, “Julie has some things that may be able to help, maybe we can numb in a little bit and we’ll figure it out.” So, we go to Julie’s and they’re trying to numb it. And they’re trying to pull it off little by little and I’m freaking out and screaming. And so, we take a pause and Julie’s just kind of caressing my arm. And she’s like, “Listen, I’m so glad you came here and had me do this.” And I was like, “Why?” And she said, “Because your sister would never be able to do this.” And then she just rips it off.

What’s so crazy is it wasn’t even the pain, it was the shock of her just going for it, rip, everything came off so fast. My face dropped and my sister didn’t even know what was coming, and she was like, “Oh my God.” To this day, we talked about this story because it was such a bold move. And she was like, “I knew your sister would never be able to do that to you.” We had spent almost the whole day trying to get it off without me experiencing pain and then it was just off in seconds and it was over with and I never had to go through it again.

So, I was really thinking about this gross story, I know, it’s really gross. But I was thinking about this story with so many of you, the required action to get that first client or make that first 25K. You do it so slowly and then it’s more painful and then you get more and more afraid to do whatever it is you need to do instead of just rip and going for it.

It’s like the cannonball into the water. What is that for you? Is it being deeply uncomfortable, the emotions that you have to risk? Is it the things you have to say on a consult? Is it getting out of your house and going to that first networking event and talking to people? You’ve got to lay it all on the line and you’ve got to immerse yourself. That’s the best way to do it, immerse yourself.

In the early days, the more time you can have learning and coaching and better thoughts towards what you want to create in your brain all day, every day, the faster you’re going to get it done. Not in a way where you’re consuming and not taking action, it’s you’re taking heavy action and what is supporting it is constantly having your brain, your ears filled with positive, useful things to keep you going. That’s what I mean by immersing yourself. And then you have to let success be the only option, the only one.

Some of you entertain failure way too often. You entertain giving up. You entertain quitting. I have never seen so many coaches quit the industry because it’s a little bit harder to sell right now than it used to be for a lot of people, not for everyone, but a lot of people are experiencing that. And it’s too hard and they’re just giving up and quitting instead of deciding this is the year I go for it. And the story I’m going to tell myself about this year is this was my year that changed everything for me.

I’m even telling myself that this is the year I’m going to remember forever as the most valuable year of my career. That’s my thought. If you want to borrow it, please feel free. I am letting success be the only option. I want you to let success be the only option. I remember one time it was so hard and I was really deep in the action taking and the feeling uncomfortable and I told my coach, “I’m just quitting. I just don’t have what it takes. I can’t take this anymore. I can’t do this anymore.” And she goes, “Okay, that’s fine, you’re allowed to quit.”

And then I was like, “Well, I mean, I don’t really want to quit.” She put it on the table and I took it off so fast. Don’t let yourself tell yourself you’re going to quit unless you’re really going to quit. But if you’re not really going to quit today, then decide success is the only option. And then you’ve got to find your value. You can’t be looking for it in the needing the yeses. You can’t find your value in getting that first 2K or getting the first 25K or being able to do it quickly. You can’t find your value there. You have to find your value from within you.

I was telling someone the other day on a call. I had the model because that’s where I got certified at The Life Coach School, I had the model written on the back of my business card. And I would walk into events where I had less money than everyone, less tangible life results than everyone, less friends than everyone, less cool clothes and cool car than everyone. And I would walk in with the belief that I was the most valuable person in the room because I had the model. It wasn’t even me. I just got the model, I’m the messenger of the model and I’ve got it and no one else here has it.

So, I have deep, immense value that no one else has, and they’re going to want it and I used to tell myself those things all the time. And so, I walked around like this highly valuable person. And because that’s the way I thought of myself and the way I thought of the tools I had access to and what I knew about the universe, the world, and how it worked to get results. I used to call myself a human behavior expert. I was an expert in understanding human behavior and getting people to change it and people loved that. They were like, “What is that, a human behavior expert?”

It was just catchy, it was exciting, but I really believed that about myself. And I attracted so many people to me, people would come to talk to me at events. I would still go talk to people, but people would come to me because they felt my energy. I got consults that way. I closed people that way. I was never worried about their objections because I knew the value that was on the line. Yes, I know it’s expensive and this is what’s at stake. Yes, I know it’s time consuming.

Yes, I know that there are other people that are going to kind of try to influence this decision for you, but this is the value that’s at stake. I know it’s going to be hard and you’ve got a long way to go, but this is the value at stake. I just always knew that. And because I was so enrolled in this belief, I enrolled other people in it. And then finally, you’ve got to let go of it being personal. The moment you let go of it being personal, and this is human, this happens to me too.

We are all human, we take results personally. We make it about us and we don’t make it about the people, what’s happening for them that they aren’t reaching out? What’s happening for them that they’re saying they’re so excited on the call, but then changing their mind and backing out or letting someone talk them out of it, what is happening in their brain? And how can I help them get to the other side?

How can I serve them at the highest, knowing what’s going to happen with their brain, knowing how hard it is for them to say yes? Knowing that they’ve never done something like this before. Knowing that it’s not very mainstream. Knowing though that they have that little dream inside of them and they really, really want to say yes because something has drawn them to you. They feel that little whisper inside of them. They want to say yes to that but it’s so incredibly difficult.

Knowing that, how can I show up to just do my best to help them cross to the other side, to commit to their dreams, to collapse their timelines and decide to get it done today? That’s what you’ve all got to do, collapse the timeline you’ve given yourself. Commit to taking action. Figure out what would be required to just get it done right now. Rip that band-aid off. Being willing to have great risk, emotional risk, social risk, be willing to risk it all. Be willing to feel deeply uncomfortable. Lay it all on the line.

Immerse yourself in your own coaching, in your own positivity, in your own learning to support yourself as you go through this. Let success be the only option available. Find your value without requiring other people to show you you’re valuable by saying yes, and let go of it being personal. Get truly into service and make it all about your people and find the people who are ready so you can get it done now.

Alright, I hope this is hugely helpful. I want you all to collapse your timelines. Don’t give yourself too much time. Get it done now. Blow your mind with what you can do in the next 30 days, the next six months, for the rest of this year, in the next 12 months, blow your mind. Be somewhere you never imagined was possible. Alright, have an amazing week and I’ll talk to you next week. 

Hey, if you are ready to make money as a life coach, I want to invite you to join my 2K for 2K program where you’re going to make your first 2,000 the hardest part and then 200,000 using my proven formula. It’s risk free, you either make your 2K or I give you your 2K back. Just head over to www.staceyboehman.com/2kfor2k. We’ll see you inside.

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