Make Money as a Life Coach® with Stacey Boehman | Having a Better Relationship with Your Business with Maggie ReyesI’ve been following along on several of my coaches’ journeys inside the 200K Mastermind and Two Million Dollar group. They’re all doing the inspiring work of bridging the gap between where they are now and where they want to be, and I wanted to feature their work over the next couple of months. 

They’re going to be on the podcast to present new ideas and share how they’ve worked through challenges, and I think their insights are going to be highly valuable to you. Here to kick off my guest host series is Maggie Reyes. Maggie is a marriage life coach who helps Type A women make their marriages stronger. Her all-time company revenue stands at over $700,000 and she’s here today to show you how to have a better relationship with your business. 

Listen in this week as Maggie applies her relationship expertise to business. She’s showing you what to do when you notice yourself feeling off track about your business, why you can feel grateful for your business, even when it’s hard, and how to create a thriving relationship with your business. 

Click here to sign up for the waitlist for the next round of the 200K Mastermind!

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What You’ll Learn from this Episode:

  • The power of tapping into gratitude for your business. 
  • How to create a thriving relationship with your business. 
  • What to do if you find yourself thinking crappy thoughts about your business. 
  • The questions we have to ask ourselves about our relationship with our businesses. 
  • How to embrace and become friends with failure. 

Listen to the Full Episode:

Featured on the Show:

Full Episode Transcript:

 

Welcome to the Make Money as a Life Coach® podcast where sales expert and master coach Stacey Boehman teaches you how to make your first 2K, 20K, and 200K using her proven formula.

Hey coaches, so today I have a very special podcast episode planned for you. I have been following along in several of my coaches journeys in the 200K Mastermind and the Two Million Dollar Group. And some of them have very inspiring work that they have done on themselves, gaps that they have bridged to get to where they are. Things that they have worked through that I think are highly valuable for you to hear from them.

So, they didn’t reach out and say, “Hey, I want to teach on the podcast.” They weren’t doing this work for anything other than themselves. But I wanted to feature their work because I felt like it would be so useful for you. So, over the next couple of months, I am going to play some of these episodes that they have recorded for you. You’re going to get to hear them throughout the next three or four months here and there. And I encourage you to take these episodes as seriously as you would take hearing from me. They are so inspiring.

I have been following their work in my pages and it’s just in the Facebook pages and on our calls. And it’s really stood out for me. So, it will be extraordinarily valuable for you. It’s one of my favorite things about masterminds as you get to learn from other people’s ideas and their work. It might not be your work at the time, but it will be your work either in the future or it is your work, and you didn’t know it was your work. They’re going to present ideas to you and how they have worked through things in a way that will be so applicable to you and your own growth and your journey.

So, I hope you enjoy this as much as I have enjoyed hearing these and watching their journey, and learning from them myself in my own self-coaching, learning how they show up in the world has been deeply impactful for me. So, without further ado please enjoy one of our guest podcasts from one of my star 200K Mastermind or Two Million Dollar Group students.

                                                                                                                  

Hello everyone, my name is Maggie Reyes, and I am so delighted to be recording this podcast episode while Stacey is on maternity leave. We are going to talk about having a better relationship with your business. But before we dive into that I want to introduce myself, give you a little bit of background about my business, what I do. And then we will dive in. This is going to be a very juicy episode. You’re going to want to take notes. I’m getting specific. Get ready.

Well, first of all I am a marriage life coach. I help type A women which really means very driven, very focused, your checklists have checklist type of women, when they want help making their marriages stronger. And I only work with individuals, not with couples. So, what I do is very unique in the industry because I teach that one person can change the world and one person can change a marriage and that’s how I run my coaching practice.

I have been working with Stacey since December of 2018, since the very first round of the 200K Mastermind. And I used the 2K process and the 200K process to go from just under 50K in a year to over a 100K, then over 200 and over $300,000 in a year. So, my coaching business has been growing every year that I’ve worked with Stacey with her mentorship and with her guidance. And with all of the concepts and tools that you hear on this podcast and that we have in 2K for 2K, and in the 200K Mastermind.

All in all, in my time working with Stacey so far my all time company revenue is over $700,000. And that is an amazing number to say out loud. When I was writing up the notes for this episode I didn’t imagine how emotional I would get to just say that sentence. But it feels amazing to be a life coach who makes money, who helps humans have better lives. And to make beautiful, really happy money doing something that helps so many people. So, I’m just going to have a moment and take a breath.

So, what else I want you to know. I want you to know that I sold out my one-on-one practice using the 2K principles and went from charging 5K for six months to charging 10K for six months. And then charging 15K for six months of working with me. And then I created my group program, The Marriage MBA with Stacey’s guidance, and with her mentorship, and her coaching. And I’ve sold approximately over $200,000 worth of that program so far. And that will continue to rise as I continue to sell that program.

I also want you to know that I have failed at many, many, many things. I’m starting with the wins but there’s also lots of fails. The first time that Stacey did a 25K in 30 Day Challenge, I failed completely. It was not fun. There were tears involved. And I kept going and then I made 25K in something like 11 days or something like that which blew my mind at the time. And it still does actually when I think about that. We do have a special bonus podcast episode that I did about the 25K in 30 Day Challenge.

I know a lot of you want to make 25K in 30 days just for the overall health of your business. But also, as you prepare and think about joining the next round of 200k. So, we will link to that episode in the show notes so that you can make 25K in 30 days, take the challenge just like I did.

I have had launches where I felt all the angst, where I was completely unsettled the whole way through. And I’ve had launches where I’ve felt smooth and calm, and everything in between. So, talking about some of the fails I want to share a fun fact with you if you are in 2K for 2K. In the consultation code that’s a series of case studies of different situations around different ways to handle things in consultations.

And there is a case study where a coach does a consultation, and the person hangs up on them right in the middle of the consult and I am that coach. Someone actually hung up on me probably while I was in the middle of a sentence and yet here I am, I have amazing clients I love helping, I make great money being a coach. And I am sharing this to say if you’ve had no shows or whacky things happen on calls, we have all had those things happen and your only job is to keep going. I really, really mean that and I know someone needs to hear that today.

So, I am telling you right now, keep going. And when it feels hard to keep going what you want to do is check-in on what kind of relationship you’re having with your business. Is your relationship struggling or is your relationship thriving? And for the segue, there we go, now we’re going to get into the meat and bones of today’s topic.

When a romantic relationship is struggling I often invite my clients to focus on what is working. In 2K for 2K it’s how we start our evaluations, what went well. It’s such a good place to start, to connect with our resourcefulness, to connect with our inner power and our ability to create results. In relationships it’s really useful to find something you can be grateful for right now even if it’s the smallest thing, whether it’s a romantic relationship or your relationship with your business. So, as you think about your business today right now, what is one thing you can be grateful for?

I really want you to think about just one thing, identify it now. I’m going to give you some examples too. Maybe it’s making your own schedule. Maybe it’s getting to talk with interesting people or using your creativity, anything like that. There are so many things we can find to feel good about when we look for them. And gratitude in any relationship is an immediate vibe booster. It immediately helps your brain go to a new place. I highly, highly recommend looking for things to be grateful for in and about your business at every opportunity.

Now, if we want to create a thriving relationship with our business we want to ask some questions. I’m going to ask some now and I want to remind you that you can get the transcript for this episode on Stacey’s website and just highlight them and use them to journal on. So here are some really great questions when you want to create a better relationship with your business.

First, what does a great relationship with my business look like? Let’s define it. Let’s explore it. Let’s think about it. How do I feel? What do I think about it? What results am I producing if my relationship with my business is thriving? And if that sounds like the components of a model, what am I thinking, how am I feeling, what am I doing, you’re absolutely right. We can model out what model am I in when I am thriving in my business? Now, you can also ask yourself, how will I know when I have a great relationship with my business?

And how will I know when I am off track? What are the signs? So, if you’re having really crappy thoughts about your business that could be a sign. And this is so important to identify especially as you get busier and busier and start making more and more money, and having more and more clients. Because sometimes the results won’t be as obvious for when you’re off track. So, if your biggest issue in your business right now is just getting clients, it’s very clear that that’s what you’re working on.

But as you get busier and busier for example, when I am off track one of the things that happens is I will notice myself overworking, working too many hours, or working hours that I didn’t commit to. Last year I also made a lot of money, but I spent a lot of money. And I realized I needed to pay closer attention to things like profitability, to how and what I spent my money on in my business. And I really wasn’t focusing my loving attention on that.

So right now, when you think about everything in your business, your clients, your time, your marketing, your consults, your offers, your coaching, your money, all the things. Which is the thing that you can focus some loving attention on right now today? If there is more than one thing that’s okay. We just gently, lovingly, pour some love in that direction one thing at a time. When someone is in a romantic relationship that doesn’t feel amazing I will often ask, “What, if you spoke to each other as if you loved each other?”

So today I’m going to ask you to do that with your business. What if every time you talked about it or thought about it you spoke to your business as if you loved it, what might shift for you if you did that? I think that we often talk to our businesses or think about our businesses as if we’re mad at them. Instead of telling your business things like, “I love you so much. You’re so amazing. I love spending time with you. I’m learning more about you and being creative with you. You are my dream come true, even the hard parts. I am living my dream every day that we’re together.”

Imagine bringing that energy to your business, what does that open up for up you? And let’s just think about that for a moment, let’s take a breath with that. Imagine talking to your business as if you loved it. So, to recap so far, to have a great relationship with your business look for and focus on what is working with gratitude. Ask questions so you can be really clear on what a great relationship looks like for you. And it will be different for all of us. And how will you know when you’re off track? And speak to your business as if you love it.

Now, another way to build a great relationship with your business is to become friends with failure. We do so much to avoid failure all the time when really when we run our own businesses the way forward is to fail over, and over, and over again and learn each time. And for me personally this is one of the things I’ve been working on in the 200K Mastermind is creating safety in my nervous system and in my thought processes around failure.

In 200K we use a tool called Intentional Thought Creation which Stacey explains in episode 94 of the podcast. So, we will link to that in the show notes, it’s episode 94. And in Intentional Thought Creation we ask ourselves, what do we already know about this thing? Whatever it is that we’re working through, what is already in our brain about this thing? And I’m going to give you a behind the scenes of my self-coaching on failure that I recently did in 200K.

I had a fail around deadlines and working with my team. And here was my intentional thought creation and then I’ll tell you a little bit about it. So, my thoughts were, I have failed before, and I will fail again. The more I fail the more I grow. I can interpret failure anyway I want. I can choose to make every fail a win. I can also choose to embrace feeling disappointed and make every fail a fail and leave it at that. Failing is not a verdict on my ability or my worthiness. It is part of the process of growth. I’m going to repeat that one because that one really was important to me.

Failing is not a verdict on my ability or my worthiness. It is part of the process of growth. The only people who never fail never try new things. And in the avoidance of failure, they also avoid the fullness of the experience of life. And I wrote in parenthesis, reminder for myself that this is not a judgment of what other people do. This is just a reminder to me that when I avoid failure I’m also avoiding the fullness of the experience of life. And I love life and I want all the fullness which means sometimes I will have to deal with some of the failure.

Another thought I had there was every time I fail I put myself on a path to make more money and better decisions. Every single time I fail I put myself on a path to make more money and better decisions. Whenever my brain tries to tell me that failing is bad I can redirect it and ask it, “How is this failure actually helping me?” And give my brain space to find the answer.

Okay, so then I did a specific intentional thought creation on the failure with deadlines and my team. And I will tell you that it was very intense when it happened. I’m telling you very calmly the story, but it was very intense when it happened. But these were my thoughts once I was able to think clearly. It is helping me become more organized, step into greater self-leadership of my time, and my projects, and of my team. If I want a bigger business where I will likely have even more team or bigger projects.

Solving this now with a few emails will help me have a process than when not having a process is likely to be way more costly in both time and money when my team is bigger, and my projects are bigger. This failure is also helping me embrace failure and think about it differently which helps me for everything else forever. So, this failure, helping me embrace failure and helping me think differently about failure will help me for everything else forever. Once I wrote down those thoughts about failure it helped me to relate to failure differently.

And this is what having a better relationship with your business is all about. It’s relating to it in a way that moves you forward and that feels nourishing and useful even when you’re going through something hard. And like I mentioned earlier, I’m telling you this story very calmly but when this thing happened with my online business manager who’s amazing, we work really closely together, I totally cried. I had to sit with feelings of disappointment and sadness before I could think clearly about how I wanted to move forward.

So, think about how you will speak to yourself and your business when you’re disappointed. Having a great relationship with your business means you can acknowledge you love it even while you’re troubleshooting something you want to improve or change. When you think about having a better relationship with your business as a coach you also have to think about having a better relationship with your clients who are such a core part of your business. There is no business without them, only an expensive hobby. Let us all remember this.

And one of the most profound pieces of coaching that I have gotten from Stacey which she says all the time in a million different ways, but I had to hear it 20 times before it actually sunk in. One of the most impactful things was this. I’m about to tell you. Assume they want what you are selling. Assume your clients want what you are selling. When I coach you all in 2K for 2K so many of you come with thoughts that selling is bad or your price is too high.

Or recently someone used the phrase that they were separating this person from their money, like they were kidnapping the money or something like that. And any thoughts similar to this are coming from an underlying mindset that the person does not want what you are selling. And we cannot have a thriving relationship with our clients and our businesses if we keep this assumption. This is so important. Assume they want what you are selling, assume it, they want it.

What you are selling is never an hour with you, it is never your coaching, it is never your modality no matter how wonderful your coaching and your modality may be, or how awesome you are. What they are buying is always what they will produce in their life as a result of spending time with you. So, I’m going to give you a couple of examples because I think this is so important and it’s so easy to forget.

If I go to a restaurant I am not there for the knife, or the fork, or the spoon, or the plate. I am buying the steak that I will enjoy because of the use of the knife. So, imagine that your coaching is the knife, and your job is to fully understand, describe completely and know exactly what kind of steak you are selling, why it’s awesome and what’s amazing about it.

Another way to think about this is imagine traveling to Hawaii on a plane. Your coaching is the plane. Hawaii is the amazing thing they will create as a result of being on that plane. Now, don’t worry about their feelings about the plane. Focus on their feelings about Hawaii and really think this through. If you’ve ever been on a plane ride, just think about this for a moment. Sometimes I don’t enjoy a plane ride. Sometimes it’s bumpy, or the plane arrives late, or the food is cold. But at the end of the day, I don’t care because at the end of the day I land in Hawaii.

So, with coaching sometimes it isn’t fun, it can be confronting and challenging, sometimes we cry, and we feel like crap. But we don’t care because at the end we get our version of Hawaii, whether it’s a better marriage, or a thriving business, or a body we love being in, or a raise, or a promotion, or just living life with more self-acceptance and more love or whatever your Hawaii is that you are selling. That is so important to remember. I cannot overstate how important this is which is why we’re spending a lot of time on it on this episode.

And I am here to tell you that you can even make multiple six figures and still forget this because I have also gotten amnesia and forgotten this. And I was reflecting on my conversion rates when I used to do one-on-one consults. My conversion rate was astronomically high. I got to the point where almost anyone I got on a consult with was a yes. And this is after many, many no’s. Remember the woman who hung up on me earlier in this episode. So don’t use that against yourself. All those no’s helped me create those yeses.

So, wherever you are in your business just don’t use this against yourself. But it was a very high conversion rate on consults and then I switched to applications. And my conversion rate went way down. And I didn’t understand why. And Stacey gave me this coaching that I’m giving you right now, assume they want what you are selling. And you know what I did with that? I did nothing with that. I was looking at my old notebooks and realized how long ago she had given me that coaching.

I sat on it, and I focused on other things. And I still made money. But I want you to see. And the reason I’m sharing this with you, I’m not proud of that. But I’m sharing it with you because I want you to know you can be so imperfect and so human and still make money, and still go back to coaching you have gotten before and implement it. And whenever you implement it, it’s still a good idea to do.

So later, Kristen Boss who runs the breakout room that I’m in, in the 200K Mastermind gave me the same coaching because I did not learn the lesson. And what I realized when I was going through those old notes was that Stacey had given me the same coaching a year before and I’d better get on that. So, I got on that and I ran some models, and I actually did lots of models but I’m going to share four of them with you today from that coaching which is another little sort of behind the scenes.

I love to sort of open the door and let you see the kind of the depth of the work that we do in the 200K Mastermind. But no matter how much money you’re making, this is going to help you whether you’re making your first 2K, your next 200K, it’s the way we think about our businesses that I want you to focus on and think about like we do on our 2K calls is how does this apply to me? So, I’m going to walk you through my first two models and then we’re going to talk about them.

So, my model was I was writing an email to sell coaching, a specific email that I was getting coached on by Kristen. And my thought was, they don’t see the value. My feeling was distrustful. My action was assume my audience doesn’t want to buy right now. And then write the email from that assumption. This was not my best thinking, people. My result was I don’t share the value in a compelling way. And I don’t see their value. I don’t see my audience’s value, my community’s value when I stay in this model. When I think they don’t see the value I’m not seeing their value.

So, I sat with that model and then I did a model on a model. So, my circumstance was this previous model that I just read to you. And then my thought was, I can trust my audience, what if that was true? What if it was true that I could trust my audience, how would I feel? I would feel curious. What actions would I take? I would see that model and decide it makes so much sense. How could that be true? I would mentally imagine working with a coach who didn’t trust me versus working with a coach who trusted me and ask myself, which experience would I rather have?

I would rather work with a coach who trusts me. So, if I trusted my audience I would create more sales, this is the result I would create. I would create more trust for myself and for my community and I would create more sales. And I would make every single email that I write, every single social media post more valuable because I demonstrate what trusting looks like. So just that demonstrating what trusting looks like is valuable. It’s modeling that for the human who’s reading it on the other side of the screen.

So, let’s pause here for a moment because I want to invite you to see how focusing on assuming they want what you’re selling changes everything about how you think, write to, communicate with, and relate with your audience. It is so important. You cannot thrive in a relationship with your business without this assumption. In romantic relationships the equivalent would be assuming positive intent. So, all my relationship coaches out there, I know you’re following along with this.

Assuming positive intent, it just means we’re going to assume that your partner might do some whacky things from time to time, but they didn’t wake up in the morning thinking I’m going to help this person have a bad day today. We assume positive intent. So, imagine relating this way to your business, just assuming everything in your business wants you the way you want it.

And I’m thinking now of a quote by Rumi who is a 13th century mystic and poet. And one of my favorite quotes of his is very simple, what you seek is seeking you. Just imagine, just for a moment that your clients are seeking you, that money is seeking you. You can assume anything you want, why not assume that is true? And act as if it is and then let’s see what happens. Let’s experiment. Let’s make it a hypothesis. What if I showed up in the world today as if what I seek is seeking me?

Okay, now we’re getting onto the next layer of those models and this layer is for those of you that are growing, and scaling, and transitioning from consultations to applications, or selling from a webpage, or from emails. So, depending where you are in your business this may not apply to you today. But hopefully it will one day so pay attention because it’ll help you, now you’re preparing yourself for the future. So, my circumstance is my conversion rate from referrals, I estimated it to be about 90%, it was very high.

My conversion rate from applications was about 41%. Then I went through my last two launches, and I added everything up and I arrived at that number. And my thought was, I don’t understand why there’s such a big difference and my feeling was confused. And my actions was I ruminated in catastrophic thinking, fun times. And it was like I would look at the data and I would feel like it was a mountain that I could never climb. I would tell myself I’m never going to figure this out. And I would act as if the difference is both a problem and an unsolvable mystery.

And my result was I would block myself form understanding. Now, what’s really interesting here is us who listen to this podcast and who are in 2K for 2K or 200K or just love making money as a life coach, as a podcast and follow these concepts and principles. We know that 41% is an amazing conversion rate. It’s literally not an actual problem. But I was treating it as if it was a problem. And notice here how normal it is for one thing to be different, or go wrong, or be outside of our expectations and then we think the world is ending.

And really it’s just a thought we are having. It is not a problem to have these thoughts. I just want to remind you that they are thoughts and not verdicts on whether you will ever succeed in business or not. So, I had that model, there was, I sat with it and then I explored my intentional model and I have those other two models that I read to you before about trusting my audience sort of in my mind while I was thinking about this. And my thought was, doing those distrust models unlocked everything for me. And my feeling was clear.

And I imagine if I was a cartoon character, I would exclaim, eureka, I found it. And my action was I analyzed what I discovered in those models which was when I was writing an email or a social media post, I was operating from this feeling of distrust, at least part of the time, not all of the time because I still had conversions. But in person when I had a human in front of me there was no distrust operating. So, there was no barrier between me and creating rapport with that person or making the sale.

And from this analysis, the conclusion I arrived at was when I removed distrust I increased in my conversion rate. So, my action would be removing distrust and increasing my conversion rate. And then my result is I have the deepest understanding of increasing my conversion rate that I have ever had. That was an amazing result, to just see it on paper and just see what I was creating with my thoughts and see how I could see it completely differently.

Once I saw that I was adding doubt when I was writing things that I didn’t add when I was in person with a human in front of me, I realized what was creating my conversion rate, big surprise, it was my thoughts. And this is literally what I’m working on right now in my business, stepping into deeper trust over, and over, and over again. And waking myself up whenever I have amnesia, snapping myself out of it.

That’s what I do sometimes, I listen to a podcast episode, I’ll go to a model in 2K or in 200K, I’ll have Stacey’s voice in my head helping to wake me up from that amnesia. So that’s what I’m working on right now.

Okay, that was a lot, I hope it helped you. I’m going to do a little mini recap. Remember that creating a thriving relationship in your business, number one, is in your control. It’s something that you can do. And there are very, very simple things that you can do that will help you create a really beautiful, loving, thriving relationship with your business. Speak to it like you love it. Focus on what is working. Ask yourself powerful questions. Assume they want what you are selling.

And decide how you will treat yourself and your business when you’re disappointed. Will you be a bully or a best friend with your business?

I love you all so much. It has been such an honor and such a joy to talk to you today. If you loved this episode, tag me on Instagram @themaggiereyes with your favorite takeaway. Tag Stacey too so she can smile while she’s on maternity leave. And if you want to connect with me about marriage coaching you can find me at maggiereyes.com.

                                                                                                                  

Hey, if you are ready to make money as a life coach, I want to invite you to join my 2K for 2K program where you’re going to make your first $2000, the hardest part, and then $200,000 using my proven formula. It’s risk-free. You either make your 2K or I give you your 2K back. Just head over to www.staceyboehman.com/2kfor2k. We’ll see you inside.

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