You’re going to hear from my students Kristen Boss, Juliana Garcia, Samantha Siffring, and Simone Seol. It’s such a gift, even just for myself, to get to sit down with these extraordinary coaches and discuss making millions in our industry, so I know you’re going to get so much out of this half of our conversation, and you aren’t going to want to miss part two next week.
Join me, Kristen, Juliana, Samantha, and Simone today as we kick off our conversation about making their first million in business, and what it took for them to create and maintain this level of success. They’re diving into how their relationship with themselves has changed since getting to this stage, and why cultivating self-love is the most important part of the journey.
Welcome to the Make Money as a Life Coach™ podcast where sales expert and life coach Stacey Boehman teaches you how to make your first 2K, 20K, and 200K using her proven formula.
Hey coaches, today I have a rare podcast for you. About a month ago, I got together with my first four students to cross the million-dollar mark. The conversation we had ended up spanning two hours. We decided to break this conversation into two episodes so that you can digest them fully and then get back to work.
It’s really an extraordinary gift to get to sit down for two hours with five people, including myself, who are in your exact industry, making millions of dollars, to share their wisdom of how they did it. So take notes.
On this episode, on part one, we discuss the relationship work you have to do with yourself in order to create and maintain a million-dollar business. I ask them what their relationship is with themselves currently after making a million dollars, what it’s like to be them at the million-dollar level.
Each coach shares their early journey to getting started, the before the millions, and we talk about creating calm and fun as the path to making millions. And why you don’t want to relax up until 200K at least, and why it’s important to build your confidence with smaller goals along the way to a million. Please enjoy this conversation with my first four million-dollar students.
Stacey: Hey coaches. Welcome to the podcast. I have four really extraordinary coaches on today to talk about making a million dollars. I’m so excited. Actually, I want to talk about a bunch of different things, but what we’re going to do is we’re just going to first go around and have everybody introduce themselves.
Tell everyone who you are, what you do, and if you happen to know your highest revenue in the last 12 months, because I think some of you are even over a million dollars. So if you happen to know those figures, tell everybody. And I’m going to dive in with all my questions, I’ve not prepped them at all, so they have no idea what we’re going to talk about today. But I do have lots of questions. So who wants to start? Kristen? You’re at the top.
Kristen: Okay, let’s do it. So I’m Kristen Boss and I am a coach for network marketers and social sellers. I teach them how to show up authentically online with mindset and marketing. And my I think biggest 12-month calendar is just over a million dollars, and I actually think this month I will break a million dollars for 2021, this year, this month.
Stacey: What is happening? That’s amazing. And we’re what, four months in, right? We’re on month five of the year. So how much money are you going to make this year? Three million I think is what you said in your Two Million Dollar group. Wink wink.
Kristen: Yeah, I said 2.5. I was like, you told me 1.5 at Two Mil group and I was like, wink, I’ll make 2.5, see you there.
Stacey: Okay, so 2.5. like that number. Alright, and what I really love is can you just tell everybody a little bit of background about your growth and your story and where you came into the coaching industry from? I would love for you to tell them just a little bit about – I think everybody should do that. But from what I’m remembering of your story, I think it’s really unique and helpful for people to hear.
Kristen: Yeah. So before I was a coach, I was actually a hair stylist. I was a celebrity hair stylist and I did hair for 15 years. So I was behind the chair holding space for people for years. I just said I was an underpaid life coach and I had my first coach in 2018 and it changed my life and I’ll never forget when that coach said, “Hey, I think you need to consider coaching.”
And I had a lot of imposter syndrome and a lot of thoughts about it, and I was like, I don’t know, maybe. So what was happening at the same time is a lot of people were asking for my input and my advice about showing up online, marketing their businesses, and I really didn’t have time for all the coffee dates that people just kept asking me for.
So I just started mentoring business owners because I loved it and I found a lot of joy, and I think I started it selling coaching services, coaching calls for $99 an hour. I don’t even think I sold a package, just like sure, I can help you, $99 here, $99 there. I really was doing that for a while, probably for about a year, and then I really sat with what if this was my career, what if this is what I was made to do, and I hired my first coach and man, it blew my mind.
I paid a lot of money. I think I paid 20K for coaches before I made my first $2000 in the business because I believed in it that much. And I went to work and created an offer and I will say before I did that, I launched an eight-week bootcamp. It was horrible. It was the worst launch ever. Eight weeks for $199.
I think I sold it to eight people, two of them were my friends, and I think they felt sorry for me. I think that most people I had show up were like, two people on a call. But I loved it. I was there for it. I showed up every single week. I think I did two calls a week, I made a book, it was insane.
And I still decided this was for me and I didn’t let that get me down, and then two months later I really got to work on my belief on my self-concept, and I was like, you know what, I’m going to sell coaching six months, 5K, and I’m willing to suck at it, I’m willing to fail, we’ll see what happens. And then I had a 20K month and that was the end of 2019 and one year later, at the end of December 2020, I think I ended last year 747K and now here we are.
Stacey: That is so fun. I love that. So were you just killing social media being a celebrity hair stylist? How did you know so much about being on social media?
Kristen: I was really gritty. I was pull everything up by your bootstraps, I remember in 2017 I was just like, I think I want to grow my social media following, I was in network marketing at the time, and I saw how things were done and I hated it. I was like, there’s got to be a way for people to show up more authentically online.
And I remember I devoted an entire summer to growing my Instagram account based on how everybody else told you do, and I hated my life. I was like, this is the worst thing ever. And I had to joke about my social media. I didn’t even talk about hair. I talked about everything else and I called it the padded bra.
I had 10,000 followers, it looked impressive, but it’s filled with stuffing. No one really cares to be there is the story I had about it. And then I was like, you know, what would it look like to show up with value and serve people? And it really started growing from there.
But my coaching business actually didn’t grow on Instagram. It grew on Facebook. It grew with me starting a Facebook group and just giving so much value. It was ridiculous. I just gave so much away for free trusting that it was always going to come back to me.
Stacey: I love that so much. I also did – I don’t know if I’ve told this story before but my very first kind of program type thing that I did, I did a six – I had two clients I think at the time who were in network marketing. And they were like, you have to do a little workshop or something for my team, you got to teach my team the model and these things that you’re teaching me.
And I was like, yeah, sure, I’ll do it for $100 a person. So I did two in-person ones and I’m like, teaching them the model and all about feelings and just all of the coach-y things. And then I had decided like, this could be a big thing. So I had said I’m going to do a virtual event and I’m going to teach you the six things I taught you in six hours over six weeks.
And I’m like, for every person you invite, we’ll take $25 off and it’s $100 for the six weeks. I mean, I was wheeling and dealing. And people were paying $25 to do a six-week program. I think I made $2000 total, and I was doing a 30-minute training every single day for six weeks.
So whatever that is, what, 42 30-minute trainings in that group, and it’s the best thing I ever did. I would never do it again but it really helped me be present and define what that looked like in video and grow my teaching skills and give a ton of value. And I gave so much value I ended up signing a bunch of one-on-one clients from that event and growing my social media following.
But it was so – I look back on that and I was recording the videos in Super 8 motels. I’m in Michigan selling mops, recording videos in a Super 8, you can see I’m on a hotel bed in the background, just what’s happening. So I just want to say for all y’all out there, if Kristen and I can do the hustle, so can you, I promise, regardless of what your background looks like. You can do it and you can do it in a small amount of time. So I love that. Thank you, Kristen. Okay, let’s go Juliana. Introduce yourself.
Juliana: Awesome, thank you. Hi everyone, my name is Juliana Garcia and what I do is I help coaches clarify their message so they can attract premium clients. So I focus on just helping coaches who want to work with fewer clients and who want to raise their prices, and I help them just with messaging and in their marketing.
Stacey: I love it. And tell everybody a little bit about your story.
Juliana: Yeah, so I mean, I have like, nine lives. So I’m going to just shorten it as much as I can. I moved from Australia, I come from Colombia, so I’m Latina, and I lived in Australia for 10 years. I thought I would just stay there. And then I started my first business and I moved to America because there were so many entrepreneurs.
And I landed in San Diego, which is kind of the Mecca of coaching. Everyone here is a coach. And I just realized like, coaches, because my background is in marketing and I kind of had studied marketing, done all the marketing things, I was like, well, maybe I can help coaches with marketing.
So I started really infusing – just going down the rabbit hole of marketing and funnels and all of that. And in the beginning of my career, I started building funnels for coaches. And the coaches I was working with, they had massive audiences. They were famous people in the space so they had the traffic to come and send to the funnel for it to convert.
And I was like, okay great, must work for me too, it must work for all the other baby coaches too, people who are starting out. And of course, when you don’t have a whole lot of people to come to you, it’s much harder to really test things and to have things convert.
And so I realized like, I wanted to not just be a digital marketing consult, I wanted to be a coach. I wanted to help people with their mindset. I wanted to help people with how they’re showing up in the world and that just wasn’t really the style for building a funnel. It was the wrong thing for the wrong person at the wrong time.
And so I started thinking like, I want to be able to show who I am and be myself online, but it feels like this whole other masculine approach to marketing just doesn’t work. It doesn’t work for me; it didn’t feel good either. And I had so much writer’s block and I didn’t know how to show up online.
And then I decided to – one day I had an idea in the shower and I was like, I’m going to expose one truth about myself for 30 days and I’m just going to share who I am online and share the wisdom that I have around marketing, about mindset, what I believe in.
And I did that, and after the end of the 30 days, I had the most paid clients I had at the highest ticket number, it was like two $15,000 clients and just by sharing my truth online, which was such a belief shift. Because I thought clients come from funnels and clients come from complexity.
And so that’s when I really just uncovered all of those belief blocks that I had around showing up online and just everything took off. I created that, I packaged a little challenge that I did for myself, people are like, oh my god, I know you from that challenge. And then they’re like, what were your prompts? I’m like, I had no prompts, I just sat there and started thinking about things I wanted to write about.
And I was like, maybe I’ll just create some prompts. So I turned that into a PDF that I just made up prompts essentially and put my examples in there. And that really just kind of took off, and people started really feeling so connected to that because they feel, coaches feel like…
Stacey: How long ago was that? Sorry, I didn’t mean to cut you off but how long ago was that? Because I felt like that was recent.
Juliana: That was 2017. Before that I was doing consulting. I was just building, kind of being the girl behind the scenes of launches and building funnels and stuff. But that was really when I was like, okay, I want to go all in on just not relying on the complexity but really letting the marketing message and the mindset and who you are really build your message and run your coaching.
So that really – I kept it so simple and now people just know me – the biggest thing is literally the thing that still people come and they just want to join simply because of the simplicity of that and how low effort it needs to be. So I kind of just really take away all the complexity of what marketing is and really focused on – I kind of just brainwash my clients into believing that their coaching is just worth a lot more than what they right now think it is.
And then I have such high belief in them that they just are like, okay, I guess I’ll believe that, it’s time for me to raise my prices. And I’m like, go for it. And they start realizing that it’s just really a thought that keeping you away from the price that you desire. So that’s really how I ended up here.
Stacey: I love it. And what’s your highest 12 months to date? If you know.
Juliana: Yes, I do because I’m in the middle of a launch, I’m tracking. Last year I made 1.5 million in sales but cash, since we only count cash here, it was 1.1 cash. And I was just tracking my numbers and at the meeting, at the Two Million Dollar meeting, I was at 731K, then I had 132K in April and then so far, in May, I’m at 162K, so that has brought me to $1,002,500. I don’t know how to pronounce that number. But what I made in a year, I’m literally $100,000 away from what I made in a year in just over a quarter.
Stacey: That’s so fun.
Juliana: I was like, maybe I need to tell Stacey that my goal might actually be more than two million. I’ve been like, I’ll just keep it at two, I’ll just keep it at two. I guess maybe I could stretch it.
Stacey: So fun. Listen, this is the way I did it because I had a year like that where I was at – the goal was 2.5. So I had done $860,000 the year before and then the next year the goal was I think the same, and then we ended up doing 2.5. And then my goal for last year was 2.5 and we ended up doing 6.4.
But what I will say because I know Kristen’s in the same boat too is one of the things that was so important was not latching on to any additional money. The way I thought about it is just like, everything is bonus from here, let’s just see what we do when we’re just having fun.
Let’s just have a good time, only do what I want to do, and let the numbers ride. Of course, we’re human, you know okay, well if I’m at this number at this quarter, two more quarters, I could end – so I remember the year that I did 6.4. In my head, I was like, we could do seven.
At the time I think maybe in August of that year I was at three, but I knew I had a big launch coming up, so I was like, I don’t know, it could be anywhere from five to seven million. And I just let that be super fun. It’ll be fun to see where the cards lay and it was so interesting that we ended almost right at 6.4.
So close to seven, and it was just perfect. So that’s my recommendation for you guys is just let it be fun. Once you blow your mind, this is what I think is so important is that you don’t let yourself get into any sort of hustle mode to make a bigger number happen because you make the most money – and everybody here will be able to talk about this, so we’ll go around and talk about this in a second too, is you do make the most money when you’re the most relaxed, when you’re the most calm, that’s when all the money floods in.
And it’s the hardest thing I think for people because at six figures and multiple six figures, I think if everyone’s being honest, you are not relaxed. It’s the least relaxed you ever are. Everyone thinks I’m going to get to 100K and life will be amazing, and I’m like, that’s the least relaxed and calm you’ll ever be.
Maybe except when you’re making your first dollars. I think that’s probably the big one. But then at 100K, it’s like, if you look at your multi-million-dollar journey, it’s the least relaxed you’ll ever be. So I’m like, once you get relaxed and calm, I’m like, stay there no matter what and then just have fun and you’ll just rake in all the money, which is so fun. So I’m so excited for you.
Juliana: Yeah, thank you so much. My whole philosophy for launching is just fun and just literally, I just made a post yesterday about this, literally used the two words fun and relaxation. Like, relaxing in the certainty of your vision and having fun.
Stacey: So good. I love it. Alright, Samantha.
Samantha: So I am a coach who helps moms build businesses. It is so fun. Okay, I don’t know the 12-month thing. I know I hit a million, and then I was like, whatever, it’s all good now.
Stacey: That’s so good. I actually love that. I love that it’s like, it’s all good now, we’re good.
Samantha: It’s like I checked that off, I’ll check in at our Two Mil meetings, but otherwise it’s like, I don’t need to be looking at the 12-month total every month or day.
Stacey: I love it. I’m a little more neurotic about it. I’m like, I got to know what my numbers are, which you guys know, I teach that in 200K. I really like to know my numbers at all times. But not in a way – I was thinking about this. Someone asked me, I just did the 200K and the Two Million Dollar group launch and someone was asking me if I made the 10 million yet and I could get into Brooke’s new mastermind.
And we’re I think at eight million for the 12 months. So I always know where I’m at, but I’m not willing to spend time with my CFO to figure out a closer approximation of when we’ll get there, to know. I’m like, it’s not really my main goal this year. I’m getting married, I want to have the babies and do all the things, so I’m like, I’m going to get there and it’s fine. But on a monthly basis, I do like to check in and know what my numbers are. But I love the energy that it’s coming from for you.
Samantha: Good. I do check in with my CFO monthly, but the 12-month number isn’t one we’re looking at right now. But I know I hit a million and some change…
Stacey: You’re happy.
Samantha: Yeah. And I got into coaching as a stay-at-home mom who had a Masters degree in counseling and was wondering how I could make money and have some kind of adult outlet. It was like, I really wanted something besides changing diapers all day long and also, we were living paycheck to paycheck and I didn’t like that. And my husband lost his job a couple times, and I also didn’t like feeling like my security was in someone else’s hands.
Stacey: So good.
Samantha: Yeah, so I was like, there’s got to be something I can do. I have all this education, how can I turn that into something without paying for childcare also? So I tried a lot of different online businesses. I had all kinds of things going on. And then I found life coaching, I heard this podcast episode of another therapist who had become a life coach, started a business online, I emailed her right away and I was like, are you hiring more coaches? I worked for her for a while.
And then after a little while, I was like, I’m an entrepreneur, I have a lot of ideas for her business that she does not want, so I’m just going to go do my own thing now. And pretty quickly – I started out as a life coach for the first year and pretty quickly then niched down specifically to help moms in that same situation that I had been in.
And now I’ve helped like, hundreds of moms and they’ve made so much money and husbands are quitting jobs and pursuing their passions and everything is just amazing.
Stacey: I love that so much. By the way, I just have to say, in case Stuart listens to this, shoutout to Stuart. He is so lovely. I loved, loved getting to meet him in Vegas. Him and Neil are like, the same person.
Samantha: I know. They’re two peas in a pod.
Stacey: They really are. I was like, oh, I love it, there’s another – I mean, I don’t know who’s older but I was like, there’s another Neil in the world, another personality like that. It’s a very complementary personality to me. So I very much enjoyed him.
Samantha: I love that. Thank you.
Stacey: Yeah, you’re welcome. Alright, Simone.
Simone: Hello, what’s up? I’m Simone Seol and I teach life coaches how to love marketing and to market from love. I talk about all that on my podcast, the Joyful Marketing podcast, of which I’m the host. And I teach a program called Joyful Marketing. I’m all about joy and love. And I think joy and love made me just shy of two million dollars in the past 12 months.
Stacey: So fun.
Simone: Profitable emotions.
Stacey: Profitable emotions, that’s so good, I love it. And you have the best story. People have heard it on this podcast, but I do think in case someone listens to this one and hasn’t heard your solo one that we did, I mean, gosh, forever ago I feel like…
Simone: Just a year ago.
Stacey: Yeah. So will you just – wait, is that true? We did one when you made a million dollars, right?
Simone: My solo one? Oh, we had two solo ones. Gosh, I’m spoilt.
Stacey: Have I just had you on a lot? I mean, listen.
Simone: You know what, actually…
Stacey: Like listen, why didn’t I get on more than once? In my brain all the time.
Simone: Yeah, one of my clients asked me, “Can you actually tell us what your actual entire story is from when you began and the incremental growth of what you charged at each stage?” So it really made me look at my own history a lot more objectively, like when was I charging what.
And I ended up writing out a whole thing that tracked my timeline and I was actually fascinated by what I wrote down because the first thought that I had when I had it written all out, and the timeline begins in 2011 was that damn, I worked so hard all of these years. Because in my mind, I was like, I don’t know, just kind of having fun, it all kind of happened, which is such a freaking lie.
I first got trained and certified as a life coach in 2011, like I said, and I fell so hard in love with coaching and with working on myself and helping other people transform their lives from the inside out. And what happened was that almost immediately after, I actually think it was an effect of me breaking my mind open by coaching. What happened was I got a really, really spectacularly messy divorce.
Stacey: I don’t think I knew that. Maybe I did.
Simone: I don’t think I’ve talked about it before. So I was like, oh my gosh, I’m going to help people with all the things, I think I know the secret to life. You know how it is when we all first learn coaching, right? It was so exciting. And then my personal life spectacularly blew up and I think…
Stacey: Yup, had that happen.
Simone: It’s a thing that happens. And then there was this tremendous conflict of how much I loved coaching and how much I believed in it, and how much I believed in myself as a coach. And then there was this clusterfuck in my personal life.
And at the time, I was so young, I was in my mid-20s and I was like, clearly, I’m not qualified to do this work because how can I be helping other people if I’m just on the floor crying all day long and I can’t get my shit together, right?
And so basically, I think the next four, five years was me trying to find out who I am and find out how to forgive myself and how to find my – basically how to like myself, how to feel at home in my own story, in my body, in my life, in my soul. I think it took me five or six years after that to really get to a point where I was like, you know what, I don’t think I’m at war with myself anymore, I think I like myself now.
So I think when I look back, that doesn’t sound like I was working on my business, but I actually was because if you’re a coach, that’s what you’re offering. You’re essentially – I think that in a really simple way, you’re selling your relationship to yourself to everybody else because that’s the only thing you can ever model and that’s the only thing you know.
So you can only sell as much self-love, self-acceptance as you have, and all the years I was making like, basically no money, like less than $1000 a year coaching just because my self-concept was in the toilet. As far as being a businesswoman, I was working on okay, so how do I not hate myself?
How do I make peace in this very painful story that I have about who I am and my life? And so I took that long to invest in myself, get coaching, get to that place, and then about four years ago, four, five years ago-ish was when I was like, okay, I’m going to learn business, I’m going to learn how to show up in the world.
And from then on, it was very slow building. I took a lot of programs, I learned a lot of things, funnels, none of it worked in the way that I wanted, but I still tried a lot of things, I learned a lot of things, I failed a lot. That all built my bones and muscle as an entrepreneur.
And I was also having so much fun because that was when I really started believing I can do this because I was done hating myself. I was done telling myself I can’t do it. So I think of that period as building my bones and muscle, and then when I found you, I knew this was it. I knew that if I went all in on what you taught, then I was truly going to become the entrepreneur that I longed to become.
And so I found you, I hired you, I worked my tail off, and when the amount of self-love and self-acceptance that you have, and you have a deep grounded level of that, and when that meets true business savvy and business coaching that’s of a high quality, I think like the kind you provide, I think that’s when the magic happens. So it seems like ever since I hired you, overnight it seems like I blew up. But it took a lot to be able to create that alchemy, to create that chemistry.
Stacey: Yeah, you’re like a 10-year overnight success.
Simone: Exactly. So since two years ago, I went into 2K in 2019, I went from $10,000 the year before to $200,000 that year because I went all in on 2K and your mastermind. Then the next year, which was 2020, I made a million dollars. And this year I just passed a million in the first four month of this year.
Stacey: It’s so crazy. So I just have to say for everyone listening, I pose this question all of the time and I don’t think people take me seriously or I think they answer without taking the question seriously and really knowing the answer for themselves and having explored it. But I often ask them, how long are you willing to take to make your business work? How long are you willing to keep working at it?
And for me, I had decided truly, the answer was forever. I’m like, there’s never a time where I’m not going to want to be a coach. But really truly, here you are, it did take 10 years. And you were willing to do it. But now you’re making millions of dollars. So every time someone tells me that it hasn’t worked and it’s been six months or eight months or two years, I’m like, have you heard of Simone?
Simone: The millions of dollars is not even the best part, and I know you know this. I know you get this. Money is truly – you know what I like about my life the most is I wake up in the morning and I love the relationship I have with myself. I trust myself.
I feel like I’m living in a way that has integrity, that is consistent with the biggest version of me that has nothing to do with how famous I am, how much money I earn, but I know I can take the risks. I know I can be courageous. I know I can love other people as much as I am capable of, I know I can love myself; I know I can make full use of the creativity that God gave me.
And that’s the treasure of the process. Money comes and goes. Who knows what’s going to happen tomorrow? There’s a war and I lose all my money, I don’t know, knock on wood. So to me, if you make – everybody who’s on the coaching journey really knows this deep down, that it’s really about their relationship to themselves.
Stacey: It’s like they forget when it comes to money. All of a sudden nothing that we got into life coaching for ever exists and matters at all. It’s so fascinating. I’m like, we’re coaches. I mean, there are some people I’m sure at this point with how lucrative coaching has become that are getting into it because it’s a really good business idea. I think the same is true for network marketing.
You get people in, Kristen, you probably know this where it’s like you get some people in because they fall in love with a product and it changed their life and they want to tell everyone about it. And then you get some people into it that are like, this could be a great business idea and I want to be an entrepreneur.
So I do think we’re probably getting some of that in the coaching industry at this point with how lucrative the successful coaches have made it. But for most people, even the people who think life coaching would be a good business idea, you don’t get into the life coaching world without inherently knowing that.
I 100% agree with you. Without knowing number one, what is the most important, your relationship with yourself, your quality of life, your experience, who you are now and who you’re becoming, of course those – for me, that’s the podcast about emotional wealth over material wealth.
We get into it knowing emotional wealth is the only thing. And then all of a sudden, money and other people and status and social media likes all of a sudden take over and we forget. It’s so fascinating. But I love that you’ve really experienced that, and I would be curious to hear everybody else’s thoughts too.
I really do think where I’m at now – and this has been a really tough year for me. I’ll be very honest and say really, the hardest personal year I’d had since probably the year where my whole life fell apart and imploded after becoming a coach. I’ve never had a harder personal journey.
And yet, I’ve also never known myself deeper than I know myself now, with the most amount of clarity and never been as okay with other people not being okay with it. Here I am, this is who I am, and it’s not for everyone and it’s okay. So I just think that’s such a beautiful thing and I do think you have to get here in order to make millions.
Simone: Absolutely. It’s the only condition. You just put it so beautifully, and the way I reflect on my own life in the past year, in the past 12 months, I went through something really hard personally, I had a miscarriage and it was heartbreaking, and as all of that was happening, I just experienced all the pain in my life with so much love for myself and I was like, oh my gosh, this is the miracle, this is the work, this is why I’m here.
Because all the worldly things, they go away, but what’s left is what you have with yourself and what’s left is your family and whoever’s around you, and those human relationships. And the journey of business has changed me, has grown me to be the human being that I am today, that can hold everything that life has to experience with so much love, and that is it. That is what I’m committed to until I die.
Stacey: I love it. I think this is a brilliant question for everybody that – especially for the people listening, I would love for everybody else to weigh in on this is what has been different about your experience with yourself, your relationship with yourself having a million-dollar business?
What’s different here than it might have been when you were at, say, multiple six figures or when you were first starting your business, whatever felt like – where was the change for you that happened, that shifted, and what does it feel like now? I think it would be really interesting for everybody to hear your experiences. Let’s start, Juliana, go for it.
Juliana: Literally, this is my favorite topic. I love that this is where we landed out of all the things two million dollar, or a million dollar. Because this year, after I did that – had an amazing result last year, I was like, great, it’s just going to keep going, we’re just going to start the year, 2021, and it’s just going to be amazing.
And I was feeling in such momentum that I didn’t expect really anything to shift. And in the very first few days of 2021 is when I experienced this such deep painful breakup that I didn’t see coming from anywhere. And I was in 200K at the time and I remember asking for you that piece of coaching.
I was like, okay Stacey, I have a launch, I have a big year, I need help in just getting myself back on track to do this launch. And I remember when you shared, “Don’t do the launch. Just pause. Take care of yourself.” And I just remember that I was like, no, that’s hilarious, actually tell me how I’m going to get myself out of here because I’m about to go on a five-day challenge I need to host.
And literally I did not. I was such a blindspot that I was not really meeting myself where I was. And in the pain, and in the healing. And it’s kind of like if you get into a car crash, you need time to heal. And it’s like for me, my heart was broken and I noticed how I wanted to move past that and just continue business as usual.
Stacey: Why do we do that? It’s so fascinating why – it’s like the same thing as what I was talking about with Simone, with once money gets involved, we forget all other things. But it’s so fascinating. You’re not the only person that has told me this, of it’s so hard when we’re grieving or we’re heartbroken or whatever is we’re having something massive and internal happening for us, it’s like we’re like, yeah, but how do I override the emotions I’m feeling to just do what I have to do in business? It’s such a fascinating thing our brains do.
Juliana: Yeah, I think for me was looking back, it’s like I wasn’t even full certainty of my vision, of my goal for example. So I was doubting that that was going to happen, therefore I had to overlook my experience and what I was going through because I wasn’t relaxing and surrendering in the full certainty that my goal was done even though I was experiencing this and even if I don’t follow through with the perfect plan, I wasn’t in full certainty that my goal was a done deal. That’s like, layer one.
And layer two was who am I if I don’t hit my goal? I’m like, I’ll be a failure, I’m not going to be whatever. Not that I think of myself – I don’t think that I go into I’m a failure, but I think it’s just like I’ll miss out on who I think I can be and I get too excited about that evolution that it feels kind of like, no, I got to put on all the things, or I got to do all the things to get there.
And so I really had to look at the conversation about self-worth and really noticing where I was attaching the money to who I was and what the money meant about me, and being able to say, “I made this much money, so therefore I’m cooler, therefore…” and there was still so much – to get to a million, you really get to look at that internal conversation.
But yet you get to a million and there’s lingering debris of what that looks like. And because there’s more money, it just kind of gets amplified even if it’s 1%. It just has a greater impact in your results and in how you’re feeling. And so it’s like the self-worth conversation and then really feeling like I have to do this in order to create this result.
And what I did instead was giving myself permission just to be with myself, and that just created such a deep level of intimacy because I got to look at the abandonment that I was experiencing from that breakup and how I was actually abandoning myself by not looking at what I was feeling. And in that, I got to literally rebuild a relationship with the person that matters the most, which is me, even though I had done so much work on myself.
You think I’ve done all the work, I got this, and then this one thing happened when you think you got it all together, and then it just comes and shows you like, the 10% or the 1% where there’s still lack of love, lack of unconditional self-love. And for me, that was the lesson. Am I willing to love myself in this? And even if the goal – no matter what, am I willing to have my own back?
And that’s something that I love that happens in this group is that no matter what, we have our back and in our result. Are you willing to go out there and give it all and still be so full of joy and so full of love for yourself for having gone all the way? And that experience really had me just take a pause.
And the funny thing is – it’s now not funny, but the funny thing is I didn’t do all the things I normally do for launch and I ended up selling out the launch and I had increased my price in my goal. And I ended up selling out 40 seats, which was – sorry, 30 seats. This time is 40. And I literally did half of the work that I did because I was like, okay, I’m willing to go there but I’m not going to do it at the expense of my experience and at the expense of how I’m feeling.
And then I just went to bed with a person that I loved. Somebody who is willing to hold space, and that to me is the greatest gift that that launch and that business really continues to give me is just am I going to bed with somebody that is loving? And literally the breakup now, I’m like thank you, because you gave me back the person that I was actually missing out on.
Stacey: So good. I love that so much. Going to bed with someone you love. I felt that in my heart. I love it. Samantha, what do you think happened for you? What do you think the biggest shift has been?
Samantha: I feel like there’s been so many but the one that came to mind was actually way back when my husband lost his job, right before I hit 200K. And…
Stacey: Oh my god, it’s so crazy. You were just at 200K when that happened? I can’t even believe it.
Samantha: I was not even there when that happened. I think I was at 150 or less, maybe even – it’s crazy. I made like, 70K that year after he lost his job and it was at the end of October. But when that happened and when you suggested that maybe he is retired now, I made a commitment with myself that I wasn’t going to pressure myself about money and making money, and that I was always going to approach myself with a lot of love and compassion.
And I kind of think about back when he was the primary earner, if every single day from when he woke up to when we went to sleep I was like, are you going to make money? Are you going to have enough for the bills? Having that cycle of those frantic anxiety thoughts, if I was hounding him with those thoughts and comments all day, I would not be a good dynamic in the relationship.
And it seems so ridiculous thinking about treating your partner like that, but so many of us entrepreneurs have that running dialogue all day every day. And I knew if I had that, I was not going to be able to perform. I was like, I know that I won’t be able to provide for the family with that going on.
So I just decided that I wouldn’t and that I was going to trust that I know how to make money and that I’ll do it. And I have, and it has grown, and it’s been consistent ever since. I’ve never had a worry of are we going to be able to pay the bills? It’s always been like, wow, look how many months of bills we can pay.
Stacey: That’s so fun.
Samantha: Yeah. Always directed my mind in that direction and just continued then for like a year and a half to just really build that trust with myself.
Stacey: I love it. So, so far, the message is for everyone listening, make sure you hear it is that you cannot treat yourself like shit to a million dollars, that the way to a million dollars is having an incredible relationship with yourself and treating yourself very kindly. And being very intimate with yourself. It’s all about that.
It’s going to be very hard to whip yourself, hate yourself, judge yourself into making a lot of money, which is so good. I’m glad that that is the barrier for a million dollars. I’m glad that you don’t have the ability to do it. And I’m sure that there are some people who are able to do it, who are high achievers, I’m sure there’s multi-millionaires, billionaires even who have hated themselves and whipped themselves to millions.
But I just love that in life coaching, this is it. If you want to make a million dollars, you’re going to have to make a lot of peace with yourself. That’s going to be the thing. So Kristen, I’m curious, was that your experience as well or did you have a different experience?
Kristen: I think mine might have been a little different. I think in the beginning, I was chasing peace that I thought came with money. When I get the money, I’ll have the peace. And I think that’s when our propensity for the hustle can kind of creep in.
And it was when I truly decided to have peace no matter what and just have fun and love the experience, I did not set out to make a million dollars this quickly. I had no idea. I was like, I just want to have fun. I just want to experience this, I just want to enjoy it, and I don’t want to beat myself into a pulp to get there.
And the more I relaxed, the more I had fun, the more came to me, and then when the million dollars did hit, I remember it felt like a big milestone birthday. Kind of like your 30th or your 21st and you expect to feel different or look in the mirror the next day and be like, hmm, I don’t look different, I don’t feel different, and you realize the money is not what creates the peace. It’s what you think about yourself that creates the peace.
And later, in this season of my business, now it’s like, if it costs me my peace, it’s too much. I will sacrifice profits to keep my peace whereas I think earlier in the journey I would have sacrificed my peace for more profit. And I think the more we embrace peace in our business, we actually attract more profit, which is just crazy.
And it’s like, the more I’m okay with myself, the more I – because I remember just a couple months ago kind of spinning out a little bit, afraid of cancel culture, and it had nothing to do with money. It had everything to do with my thoughts about myself and really having to – what am I choosing to think? What am I going to think about myself now? Because money can’t inform my thoughts. I have to inform my thoughts.
So it’s just been really healing to realize I can have my thoughts and I can still choose peace no matter what is in the bank account. And when we separate our peace from the bank account, truly, magic happens. It really does.
Stacey: So good. And I love that you’re honest and you’re like, there’s a time in my business where I would have chosen the money over peace. And I want to offer because I do think there are also two kinds of peace. And we don’t always want to be – so I just want to clarify, I don’t think we always want to be aiming for that.
It just depends on where the growth is. So I want to give an example because there was a time where I will have chosen the money over the peace too, in a way that I think was really healthy and served me. And I think the same is true for you.
When we did your first two million – when we started the Two Million Dollar group, we went through everybody’s offerings the year before, and Kristen was very much like me, where when I went into Million Dollar Mentoring with Brooke, we had five million offers.
The list was so long I was exhausted writing it out. And what I love though about that is you were willing to do the hustle that you needed to do to get your business off the ground and experiment. It was very clear you experimented with lots of offers and lots of things.
But that isn’t necessarily a bad thing. And so I think sometimes coaches get confused on this, and in the beginning, they’re trying to create a bunch of peace in a way that really doesn’t serve them and keeps them from getting their ass to work, and doing the hard things.
And so it’s like the emotion of grit and having that grit and having courage and having discipline and being willing to fail and put yourself out there, that isn’t going to feel like peace. Making your first 100K, 200K, there’s a large chance, there’s a high probability that’s not going to feel like peace. It’s going to feel like literally fight or flight, I’m going to die, and it’s the healthiest thing you can do for yourself.
And then there’s going to be a time and this is why I think the mentorship at the million dollar and the two-million-dollar level is so different is because then there’s a time where you’ve done that and then you have to slow yourself down, calm yourself down, and the peace you’re looking for is what I think everybody has touched on is that peace with yourself and that lack of – not having a strong attachment to the money.
And it’s more about who you’re being when you’re making the money and how you’re being when you’re having the money. And it’s just a little bit of a different shift, where you’re not – you don’t have to push yourself with grit as much, you don’t have to do things – it’s just a little bit of a different switch, so I just wanted to offer that to everybody listening.
That in the beginning, it’s not – for those of you that are making your first 2K, your goal isn’t to necessarily wake up in the morning and be like, how do I have a life with ease and love myself and my business? Go make some fucking offers. Dear God, go out there, meet people, tell them you’re a coach, make offers.
But once you’ve really gotten yourself to that place and you’ve made a substantial amount of money, it is time to slow down and flip that a little bit, where I often say to the 200K people when they’re coming in and they’re looking at – I was just telling someone – we do a Q&A info call and I was just telling someone, she’s like, “I’m going to make 300K this year.”
But where she was on track for was more like 150 or 200, and I said would you be willing to just do the 200 because at these numbers, that extra 100K isn’t worth you hustling to get there. Versus, I do think the first 200K, it’s worth you doing a little bit of hustle. It’s worth you being willing to go well outside your comfort zone to become the person who can create any result.
And once you have that, then it becomes fine-tuning the result in a way that you really love, that’s perfect for you, that’s more aligned with who you are. And I think all of you I’m sure can speak to that as well is like, I think in the beginning, I teach so hard on follow the process because you don’t know who you are yet.
So follow this process and then just make the money and create the business that’s sustainable. And then let’s take a step back once you know the process foundationally of making money, and then let’s find out who you really are, how you want to run your business, what you want your rules to be, what do you want it to feel like for you, what maybe is different about – especially if you’re a business coach, what’s different about what you’ve learned and then how you’ve applied that, and how it’s perfect for you and a little bit different than what you’ve learned? There’s so many nuances to coming from 200K and going to two million. And it really is like, it all boils down to that relationship with yourself.
Simone: I think before you’ve made 200K, the reason it’s not a good time to relax and just take it easy is because you have no idea where your limit is. And the first journey to…
Stacey: And most of the time you’re like, lying to yourself about what your limit is, right? So many limiting beliefs that you’re like, oh, I have no limit.
Simone: Right, exactly. So on the one hand you’re so limited, on the other hand you’re telling yourself you’re unlimited. So you have no idea where the actual limit is and how far you can push it. The point of the hustle is not to make yourself miserable but for you to really test yourself and find out who you are.
I just really want to echo that. I always raise an eyebrow whenever one of my clients is like, “I want a three-day work week,” and they haven’t made their first 100K. I’m like, no, you are so wrong about – you think you’re going to be exhausted when you do four coaching calls back-to-back. You won’t. And you won’t get to meet that version of yourself who can pull that off if you just tell yourself, I just want it to be easy.
Stacey: Yeah. You have to earn the three-day work week. I talked about that in a podcast with Lindsay Dotzlaf. You have to earn that. And it took me two years to earn that because of where my business was and what was happening in the backend of my business and my client deliverables and where my mind was.
It took – and there was a time where there was no possibility ever of me putting my schedule into a calendar and then honoring it and just getting it done. I didn’t have that skillset in my mind and I had to create that.
And now, I don’t even do that. I’m able to do it without doing that, and I can be productive in both ways. But I think that’s so important, it’s like, I had to learn how to do that. You have to earn – it’s like earning the result. It’s also interesting because I say this a lot with – when people haven’t made any money and they’re like, “Well, I just want to go from zero to a million dollars because you can create any result you want with your mind.”
And I’m like, yes, but you have to earn creating any result with your mind. And you do that in smaller increments along the way. When you make 100K, you’re going to know you can create any result with your mind. And then you’re going to go test that to make 200K, 300K, 500K, then a million, then two million.
And we all have different numbers and between us not always that perfectly cut and clear. But you have to build that up, you have to build that muscle, no differently than if you went to the gym and had never worked out. You wouldn’t be picking up 50-pound weights and be like, well, I can create any result I want.
The human body is capable of lifting 50 pounds, but you’re going to need to start with two and then go up to five, and then 10, and then 15. And it might take some time and it’s okay, it’s totally fine. Okay, so can I pivot a little bit? This conversation, unless anyone wanted to add to that before we move on.
Juliana: I just wanted to say that I think what people miss out on is when they don’t relax into that process we’re talking about. They miss out on building such confidence in themselves because once you have that, you can look back and see the evidence of oh, if I did that then I’m sure I can do more.
And so if we don’t, if we look at just jumping too fast, you don’t have the evidence. So it’s such a beautiful way to just build evidence of what you’re capable of because once you have one client, you have two, you have three, you have four, you made 100K, it’s like, wait, now I feel like I have something under my belt that I can look back on. And that just gives you so much confidence of like, no one can take that away from you.
Stacey: So good. I love it.
Okay friends, so we are going to stop here for this week. Next week, we are devoting an entire episode to the question I ask my students next. Part two is all about the one to two unexpected changes or shifts that six-figure earners don’t expect to have to make, that they must make in order to create a seven-figure business.
My students’ answers were brilliant. They are extraordinary examples of the Two Million Dollar group and the process of making millions. I cannot wait for you to hear it. See you next week.
Hey, if you are ready to make money as a life coach, I want to invite you to join my 2K for 2K program where you’re going to make your first $2000, the hardest part, and then $200,000 using my proven formula. It’s risk-free. You either make your 2K or I give you your 2K back. Just head over to www.staceyboehman.com/2kfor2k. We’ll see you inside.